Don’t say NOTHING - Please don’t pretend it has happened and say nothing..
Just say - ”I’m sorry for your loss” or ”I’m here if you”
Don’t say - ”It’s better that way” or “It’s natures way” or refer to the baby as an “it”
Choose your words - I was talking to a group of people about Titan one evening and someone piped up and said “oh did you name it ” - It was such a gut wrenching and horrifying moment I think everyone was so mortified and shocked that no-one said anything.
Be BRAVE - This family will need you know more than ever (it’s ok to cry with them it’s nice for them to know that you are suffering also)
Don’t Retreat - The person whom has lost does not need to deal with a loss of a friendship as-well.
Send a card - I loved recieving all of the beautiful sympathy cards – I pull them out and have a read of them whenever I need to.
Buy a Gift - Their birth flower, a tree, there birthstone.
Go to the Funeral - It was so beautiful to arrive at Titan’s funeral to see so many beautiful faces they were there to validate his life and support us in our loss.
Be practical - Cook Dinners, do washing, If there are other children offer to pick them up from school or drop them to sport etc
Use the baby’s name - Honestly, hearing your babies name after they have gone is so meaningful.
Encourage outings - After a month or so, or when you feel it’s the right offer to take them out.
Visit the baby child’s grave - I loved it when I visited Titan’s grave and would see notes or flowers from others it really made me feel like they felt his loss also.
Offer to help in a financial way - If you are able to offer to help with financial matters as both parents may not be capable of working.
Time heals - It will take years, be there for the long haul!
If there is anything I have missed please add. Thanks xxx