This year has been big - cancer, caught early thank goodness but I can't have anymore children which I am struggling with, separated from my husband (I believe that's been a positive but not easy by any means), had several major surgeries and multiple smaller procedures and then to top if off had a complication where I almost died. There's been many good things but the recent medical issues are really raw and have really rocked me. I have been in hospital a lot and really miss the kids. My mum has been my rock but she doesn't live close.
I'm in a job I don't enjoy and in a town that I have no village and limited support for me as a person. I want a break and things to change. I've got a good paying job but I've hated it from day one.
I have thought about what I really want lately and I am on the life's too short path majorly because I feel like although I have grown so much through this ive realised I have wasted so many years depressed, anxious and in autopilot.
I want to spend time with my kids and not be constantly racing to finish work to race around for another hour picking them up. I want a break from the bullshit at work. I want to do something rewarding. I want to live somewhere near water and that's warm. I want to recreate my life and have more time with my kids. I know I'm dreaming but I feel improvements are achievable from the current situation.
I am thinking about extending my leave without pay and put the kids, the dog and the camping gear in the car and seeing where it takes us. Just for a month or 2. I could tell my ex partner he can live in the house for a while which I believe will need to be sold anyway and just go.
One of my kids is in primary school and the other kinder.
I feel like if we like somewhere we won't come back. My kids love traveling and I feel like it wouldn't be easy but we could have some great experiences.
Has anyone ever done this? How did you do it?
My life is going to change once we go through financial separation anyway. I feel like the kids and I have been a team through this. Ive done everything for them and their father only does things when it suits him. He also has no awareness of boundaries with me.
Please no nasty comments you have no idea what I/we have been through and I just want us to be happy and spend time together. If we choose to come back we can.
Thanks
5 Replies
I think this sounds good. If yours ex is happy for you to take off with the kids, jump at the idea. It sounds like the kids and you could do with break.
my worry is that you have high expectations for the travel and feel like it's going to make everything better or to solve some problems/fill voids, so long as you know that it's obviously *probably* not going to make life perfect and different other life things (complications) will pop up.
All the best. I'd love to pack up and travel, it's honestly lots of fun with kids.
Best time to do it. Sounds like a great plan. If you can get leave from work you're not even risking any thing while you figure it out
Do it. Commit to 2 months, organise a small amount of schoolwork to take with you. Make sure the car gets a service. Go. You're right, life is too short and there's lots of us working jobs we don't love to pay the bills but there has to be an out - even just for a while and after all you've had going on you're well past needing a break from reality for a while.
Don’t hesitate, or put any thing off.. do exactly what you want and go.!!
I just want to make it clear I have no intention of cutting the kids off from their father and my words of not coming back were probably the wrong choice and I definitely didn't mean they will never see him. I have fought tooth and nail to get him to do things with his kids because I believe kids need both parents.
One of my children has been very worried about me and I'm trying to show them im going to be ok and I guess I'm trying to show myself that too.
There are many options and travelling is something my ex and I have discussed many times.
This response is kinda directed at some of the FB answers.
Thankyou for the supportive messages and encouragement, it's been a tough time.