I’m hoping this won’t be too long but girls I need your help.
I’m a young women who has been suffering with anxiety for a few years. I’ve been on medications , seen Therpist’s after therpists . I have been diagnosed with depression as well in the recent years.
My boyfriend and I dated for almost a year, broke up with me recently . We were moving down south in January and buying a house. I can’t seem to get ahead , literally . He’s a narcissist and he’s making me feel like shit .
I take a step forward and there I am crying at the sink, in the car, having a panic attack going to sleep thinking I’m not good enough for anyone, my love isn’t good enough including my family. I have had suicide thoughts before and I’m on the brink of it again .
I know this may not be a lot to deal with for others, but to me I’m struggling more then I have ever been.
Even if you just share your story’s of heartbrake it would be highly appreciated .. maybe I will get better , maybe I’m not alone
What can I do? To get myself ahead
Thank you so much x you have no idea how much this means to me x
9 Replies
13 11 14 - call that number and just chat for ages! That’s for now :)
Life can and will get better. His narcissistic behaviour hasn’t undermined your self worth. You are strong, you are beautiful, you can do this!
Honestly I've always been gutted with break ups. And that was pre-anxiety. My anxiety started when I fell pregnant and increased after I gave birth. It took 7 years to be fairly well managed. During that time there were days I couldn't be in the house but couldn't function. Hubby would bundle me, the toddler and the baby into the car and drive towards mountains or somewhere the scenery was nice. No talking, just stopping for breastfeed, to let me out if I was hyperventilating and claustrophobic and holding my hand when I cried. He knew who I was and that I would get back to being me in time. Obviously the man you loved this time can't get through the tough times and that won't make a lasting marriage. You will meet a man who loves you not because of a particular thing, but in spite of your worst qualities. Hang out for him xxx
❤️❤️❤️❤️ So much YES to this comment... 😊
You’re not alone.
And you are enough.
I suffered from anxiety and was shattered when my ex husband (of 13yrs) left me with 2 kids under 2 (1 chronically ill). It was very tough emotionally and I had no income so had to move back with my parents, so that meant new home, new daycare, no friends, new doctors, lost my job (due to no more extended leave for my sick bub) and I was extremely sleep deprived with both non sleepers and my family got sick of this quickly and didn’t help out much. I was quite isolated for years. My ex husband did muck me around a bit with moving on.
One day, I just decided that I’d had enough of the mucking around and I had a complete break from him. It hurt so much and I didn’t really have room to grieve how I needed so I bottled my feelings up for a long time. Eventually, I had a breakdown. But since that breakdown, I have never been that low again and I don’t think I ever will be. I’ve grown so much, and am so much stronger and happier. I value the small things in life and live in the moment. The more self worth I gained the more I realised my ex husband was a narcissist and that my life and my kids are so much better having minimal contact with him.
I hope this helps, you’ve got this 😉💪🏼🙂
Oh my god,aside from a few finer details, much more supportive family, I could have written this ❤️
You have dodged a bullet there Darling! If he was toxic you need to breathe fresh air.
Think of it as a refresh. Work towards baby steps that are good for you. Watch a comedy for a good laugh. Go to the park and watch dogs play. The Simple things. Walk in the sunshine. Get your hair done. Do the things you want to do but couldn't before.
Stay in touch with your medical team - doc and therapist. They will be big help for healing. You need you, more than you need anyone else. You need to be your own best friend x
NO CONTACT. Block him on everything so he cant contact you. Do not contact him that is what he wants. Its hard but worth it in the long run
You are not alone. My husband is a covert narcissist. The tactics they use are truly destroying- mentally emotionally and physically. Learn all you can about it. The tactics they use to trauma bond you to them. Find a therapist with experience in narcissistic abuse. Join some of the closed facebook groups for Narcassistic abuse victims and survivors. The advice and support is amazing.
I’m sorry you are feeling this way.
To give you something to know life goes on and things do get better I will share my story.
I was 19, huge problems with my mum, using drugs kicked out of home. Met this guy I would never have imagened for myself being with.
He managed to manipulate me,
He told me he loved me. I ended up in a relationship.
He lied, cheated, abused verbally, physically mentally emotionally. He even threw $500 cash into a fire place, ripped jewellery off me and pegged them onto train tracks, picked me up by my neck, isolated me from friends and family, intentionally wrote my car off the list goes on and on and on.
I finally left and what was left of me was a disaster. Train wreck
I did so many things I wish I could take back on the bender I went on to try and make myself feel better
I was severely depressed with zero self worth.
I met someone straight off that and that was probably not the best thing to do but I’m 11 years on 6 years married with 2 amazing children.
During this time I have still been an anxious wreck with severe depression and very little self worth.
I refuse psychologists (not a good idea)
Have tried meds - it’s taken me a long time to get healthy sleeping patterns but I’m getting there.
Anyway, this year I have found my calling - spirituality - meditation, yoga, self assessment self help - working on myself and realising that I am good enough and taking the time to release my negative stuff.
Lots of journaling etc
I have learnt that our life is how we make it.
I have taken responsibility of my own choices and actions (I could have left him and changed my circumstances long before they got to where they were - or chosen to not be with him) but it was a lesson. A frightening and hard lesson. But I forgive him and mostly myself
I am not preaching here just sharing my experiences that may also help you.
I haven’t tried it but I do recommend speaking to your GP and looking into holistic/natural approaches to such problems.
Have a good cry when ever you need, self love by having massages, hair appointments, going out with friends, get back to finding who you are and what makes you happy. Think about your childhood and everything you wished for and start thinking about how you can make some of that magic happen.
I truly wish you all the best and hope you find some peace.
You are loved, lovable and worth this life!
Remember that 💞