Husband lying by omission

*Edit* So many of you obviously didn’t read the whole thing. Two teen kids- when they were little I opted to be a stay at home mum. I have worked part time, and tried full time since they were in kindergarten. I said yes to one animal, he now has over 200, takes a mile. I put my foot down about something (not everything, or even lots of things) and he disregarded my request. I’ve never stopped him from hanging out with friends, building his hobby (that has taken over the 3 bay shed, 20ft container, and any spare space in our house) I said no to 5 things in 17 years and he’s done them anyway. He CAN work up to 60 hours a week. Some he will only work 30 but then he’s still not spending time with us as a family due to his hobby that I have never been against, and don’t forget it’s 100’s of animals. He can’t just not care for them as they will perish. I should have also said I wanted the counseling to understand him, not change him. I’d never give him an ultimatum, it’s not my style but when he refuses to “talk” to me it’s hard to move forward.
The comments haven’t affected me in a negative way but it has opened my eyes to many other issues that society has and makes me thankful for my tribe that have my back. We build each other up, we don’t tear other women down. If you can choose to be anything in life, be kind.
Thank you all for the comments. I did ask for them

Hey sisters, please help with my marriage. Seeing a therapist but long wait times. Long post, strap in!
I have been with my husband 17 years, married 10 & two teen children.
I love him (I think) and can see myself growing old(er) with him but our entire relationship we have always had the same beef surface and I’m getting sick of the merry-go-round.
I say yes to ONE thing and he takes a mile x10. I put my foot down about something and he tells me I’m being unreasonable. I say no and he does it anyway. It’s going to be difficult explaining exactly what’s going on as it will easily give away my anonymity if I use specifics.
A few years ago I told him straight that if he breeds a particular thing I’m done, I’m moving out.
18 months later I discover he’s doing exactly what I asked him not to do.
He realises I’m serious when I tell him I’m looking for a rental and he tells me he will get rid of them.
8 months later (yesterday) I find out he still has them and he states “if they breed they breed” I’m not doing it intentionally!
He knows I HATE what he’s doing but thinks that because it’s not near the house it’s ok.
The lying by omission I see now is constant and his lack of regard for my feelings makes me feel disrespected and like he doesn’t care.
We have many other issues and I have always put aside my feelings, my needs, my wishes as I know that I love him and he feels he is a supportive husband and father.
He never tells me no, he has never abused me or the kids. He gives me everything he can financially and will do the cooking, dishes, laundry and almost anything I ask (& remind him several times) to do.
I have only ever been able to work part time as he can work up to 60 hrs a week and always puts work first. So I have always done the kids (I wanted to be a stay at home mum) housework, groceries, bills and had the mental load of running the family.
He has flat refused to go to counselling as, and I quote “I won’t ever change”.
If I ever try to speak to him about issues in our relationship he gets defensive, starts yelling and then turns it around saying he’s never good enough, I always want more or he starts comparing what ever I want to discuss with my smoking.
Help….. how do I get past this or make the decision to move on. Being a single mum does not scare me as he is hardly around and even when he is he’s doing his own thing and never wants to do “family” things or anything that doesn’t interest him.
Financially i would struggle but i would make it work.