Hi Moms. My beautiful 11 year old daughter is overweight. She is tall for her age but carries a lot of weight around her middle. Her dr has said ( privately to me) that yes she is overweight but just to keep offering healthy foods. As her Mom, with my own weight issues, I am always very careful to talk about my own body well e.g Mom is exercizing to feel better, Mom is eating more veggies and protein so I have more energy. I do the same with her. (When I was an overweight kid, my own Mom never commented negatively about my body, but always did with her own so I am conshious not to do that).
Partner and I try to be role models by exercizing regularly and eating well. Kids have always just had water as a drink, make their own healthy lunchboxes etc, kids have Wheatbix, oats, or all bran for breakfast. Lunch is usually sanwich with meat or cheese and dinner is a recipe from a healthy food cookbook. We portion our meals out so getting seconds is rarely an option. Snacks are usually fruit, cottage cheese, yoghurt, some healthier processed snacks e.g low sugar muesli bar, salada crackers, choc chickpeas, some healthy baked goods. I have done a nutrition course in the past so I have a general idea of the best food options.
Daughter is quite fussy and doesn't like many veggies or savoury foods but loves her fruit, cheese, bread and sugar. We try to have treats every now and again ( probably too many slip in though). If we go out, or eat junk food, she will often eat until she feels too full or sick.
Daughter does a 30 min tennis class twice a week that she likes but other than that , doesn't do much exercize. She would much prefer to read or do art - even at recess at school. She has always been last kid in races and tires faster than her friends when playing. This wouldn't bother me as she is more athletic than I was as a kid anyway, but it bothers her. She has also started to realise that she is needing a much larger school uniform and clothing size when shopping than other kids but just says ' oh well, if this stops fitting me soon, you can just buy me the next size up'.
I am so aware that Moms are often biggest influence in daughter's having neg body image and I don't want to do that. How can I encurage her to move her body and eat better, smaller portions etc without making it sound horrible? Whenever I suggest 'how about we eat this for a snack instead cos we have had a few treats lately?' she gets angry.
What are some phrases/ tips/ things I can do to help? I just want her to feel good about herself and be healthy.
2 Replies
Make snacks so she won't help herself so much. Most kids love snacks that are quick and easy, like grab and go stuff. If you have snacks ready to go in a single portion container it will be easier to eat. Like how nobody eats watermelon unless someone cuts it up then its gone in 10 minutes *cough cough my teens*, convenience will usually win over having to put effort in. Instead of talking about exercise talk about activities instead like bush walking, beach, even going to places where you're on your feet all day is good exercise like the zoo, window shopping, touristy things like museums and art galleries. They all involve a lot of walking and usually stairs. Keep it fun.
Food sounds good, well done 👍
As others have said hormones are probably playing a part but I would say 2x30 mins exercise isn’t enough for anyone in a week so find something you can do together most days - morning or afternoon/evening fast walk, or a dance program online you can do in the living room! Squats etc are great too for weight bearing. Make it a fun challenge for the whole family and set good habits for life