I have 2 boys, teen and pre-teen, who just dont care to try to establish and maintain friendships. They each have a couple of kids who they hang out with at school but come holidays they dont want to organise to see them. I offer for them to invite them over but they dont want to. They are very picky in who they call their 'friends' and I worry that they will end up lonely. They were rarely invited to other kids birthday parties over the years of primary school. Even when we have other people over who have similar age children they will often just zone out and watch ipads or do their own thing. How can I encourage more interaction or get them to value the small amount of friends they do have?
Do your kids care about having and hanging out with friends/other kids?
Do your kids care about having and hanging out with friends/other kids?
Posted in:
Kids, Teenagers, Tips and Advice
6 Replies
Maybe they're just really introverted? If they're happy than I wouldn't worry about it.
You don't...they are happy in solitude and that's ok! Less drama that way. There's nothing wrong with being happy just being by yourself. I wish we could normalise not trying to change being an introvert.
Yesssss, thank you for saying this x
Also, I bet they are great friends to the small number they have at school and value them more than the extroverts lol
Lol, my best friend and I rarely catch up maybe once a year. We text like once a month and that's enough. Not everyone needs to see their friends all of the time. I actually get really drained if I socialise too often. I'm not lonely at all either.
There's a bit of a shift happening I think and teens are just not as social as they once were. When I was a teen I was out regularly and I was a shy kid with only a small group of friends. Things have changed now, its harder for teens to physically catch up because they aren't as savvy as we were in regards to getting places and finding things to do. We would catch trains, buses, walk, ride in all kinds of weather and it wasn't always something really exciting that we were going to. Go through all that just to go to a shopping centre because one of us needed new shoes or we would have enough money for movies or bowling lol. Now the drive to kill boredom has been replaced with social media and gaming. Its very different to before everyone had the internet. Theres also alot more fear around letting them off on their own, we are texting, calling, stalking and lecturing them, we are giving them anxiety about going out. I feel so old saying that but I'm only in my 40's and can see how different my childhood was to my own kids who are now young adults.