My MIL has always said she could breastfeed my children for me (wtf). Now we have a baby I am terrified to let her be alone with my child. What if she tries to latch him? I clearly expressed my disgust but this woman thinks it's normal because "the grandmother used to feed their grandchildren and it was very normal". I've been having nightmares about it and it has made me feel sick. I don't want to deny my child a grandparent but the thought of her boob in my child's mouth makes me die inside.
Where are all the amazing MILs and why is mine bat shit crazy!!!!
Granny breastfeeding
Granny breastfeeding
Posted in:
Baby & Toddler, Baby Feeding
12 Replies
Don't leave your child with her. That would freak me out too, I'm sure it's normal in some cultures/families and good for them, but if you've expressed that you're not OK with it and she has still suggested she would do it, then nope, grandma doesn't get to babysit until your baby is past the baby stage. Even then I would be worried she's going to go against what you want for your child.
I was married to a foreigner and the amount of times I heard of MIL doing this to someone, because it's culturally the done thing. And people handle it differently. At the end of the day, cultural norms or not, she needs to respect that's not a cultural norms for you, and it's a deep issue, and she is not to do it. What the parent says goes, and if she culturally can't respect that, then it's ok not to let her alone with the baby. Have the discussion, make it super fucking clear that it's not ok and it's not to be done, whether you know or not, its about trust.
How do they lactate? Bizarre.
They use it as a dummy in places with low money or sanitation. I guess that works to settle a baby, but definitely not essential if you've been told by mum no.
My grandparents were very catholic, my grandmother was still having babies (and therefore lactating) when her oldest children were beginning to have their own babies.
Some of my cousins are older than my dad as a result lol.
She believes that she spontaneously lactates when she is around babies. 🤮
Yuk urghhhh
I’d be freaked out too. That’s not normal. What does your husband say? I wouldn’t leave my child alone with her.
Husband is 100% supportive of me.
You don't trust her to respect your wishes, that means one thing - Sorry Granny, no unsupervised access to baby for you! Period!
That doesn't just apply to this breastfeeding issue, it goes for anything!
Don't think you're alone though, quite a few of us have bat shit mother in laws who need to learn their place!
Neither my mum or MIL have expressed the need or want to breastfeed my children.
But I don't trust either of them for other things they have done with their other grandchildren. Neither of my children (oldest is 4, youngest is almost 2) have been left alone with anyone except for my first when I had my second and that was for about 6 hours.
Even though my children haven't spent time alone with them, they still have a wonderful bond with all their grandparents, aunties, uncles and cousins.
I don't think you are depriving your child at all. They will create a bond in other ways. And I definitely wouldn't be leaving them with someone I didn't feel I could trust, Grandparents or not
Lol ffs. Ok granted it’s not normal for you. Some cultures this is normal. What has she said when you said you aren’t interested in that? Did she appear to respect your wishes?if not wait till she’s a bit older to leave her alone with her. Wouldn’t say she’s bat shit crazy. Different yes.