Hello ladies!!
In need of some advice please!
I’ll try make it short and not so sweet. So my MIL thrives on drama! She has a problem with almost everyone on the planet! I was waiting for the day she would target me. Now I’ve done a lot for this woman, taken her everywhere she wants to go, lent her money, gifts, treated her so well and always just ignored her bad behaviour towards my partner and the rest of the family. So now she’s targeted me telling my partner that I’ve been speaking badly about her and the family to someone which is completely untrue. This woman has alienated everyone around her, I’ve never spoken ill about her to anyone! Yet she’s started on me. She’s verbally attacked me over this and still won’t tell me what was said or who said it. My partner refuses to acknowledge her bad behaviour because it’s his mother and doesn’t want the drama which is fair enough but I feel like I’m stuck between and rock and a hard place as to what to do about it. Do I just ignore this and we get on with our life? We have a great relationship and are very happy but this has upset me really badly.
Please help!
9 Replies
Just ignore her and get on with your life. You’ll never reason with her.
I would however not be doing anything for her any more and I wouldn’t be having contact with her.
Ignore her, you will never win when it comes to people like this. Stop making contact, stop doing things to help her. Just take about 10 massive steps back from all the drama. The main issue would be your husband being spineless and refusing to have your back when it comes to his family. Drama or not HE should be putting his foot down and telling her to pull her head In
You really need your partners support and for him to back you 100%, if not there is no point and you my as well ignore it.
Chances are, she is the type of person who believes her own lies so strongly that you'll never get through anyway
Time to keep your distance with this woman, a lot of it.
I would brush her. It may make her behaviour first but she has no ammunition if your not engaging her.
I too have a MIL who is very sneaky and very manipulative. Lucky for my she has over stepped and her son is seeing through her more and more
Step back... A lot.
Why won't she tell you who this imaginary friend is? Have that conversation on speaker phone with your husband present.
If she can't or refuses to tell you, I would say no more to a relationship with her.
This woman gets very defensive extremely easy, so it will be yelling and screaming like she did to me the other day! There’s no way she will answer me, will just say you know what you’ve done and call me a fake and all the other names under the sun!
I wouldnt do anything different. Just carry on being your own beautiful self and if she says something that is untrue within earshot state calmly that it is inaccurate and that never happened. Exhibit a quiet unwavering strength. Dont roll over just state your truth.
Oh god, I could have written this myself. I was in a similar situation with my mother in law. It was causing issues between my husband and I because I was essentially being stalked and harassed and he wasn't doing doing anything about it. I was like "how much has to happen before you react?!" I ended up leaving because I didn't feel safe or supported. I went home after a few days. She continued to carry on. It escalated to extreme levels. My husband finally saw how intense the situation was and how valid my fears were. Police were called and he supported my in taking out an AVO against her. Ultimately you need for him to support you because if he doesn't, he is accepting her negative behaviour. She will continue to push it as far as she can. You need to be a united front. We did attend a few counselling sessions with just the two of us to help us establish healthy boundaries with her, to help us communicate better and to give us strategies to not let it affect our relationship as much. That was before is escalated to AVO level but if was helpful to get is on the same page.