Help a girl out....How do you find time to exercise and take time for just you? My husband and I have been together 15 years, had children really young and I just feel like my whole life is consumed with the needs of everyone else. By the time I get 5 to myself, I am exhausted and just want to sleep. My husband works shift work, I work full-time, our boys are in upper primary and lower secondary and I am forever running around to tutoring and sports plus the homework, appointments and running the household. I feel like I have to think for everyone in the house and have little to no support. I am struggling big time and feel so unhappy. I feel like my whole life has been a mistake and I don't know how to dig myself out of this hole. How do I just take half an hour/an hour to myself everyday? When do you find time to exercise and for yourself?
8 Replies
Early in the morning before everyone wakes up.
Or cut off some extra curricular activities?
We have a rule in my house that each child does one sport or activity aside from swimming (which I see as an essential skill) and my husband and I make sure it fits into our family 'schedule' so that no one is the household gets burnt out like you seem to be. I absolutely make time to exercise or catch up with friends for a coffee because I'm just as important as everyone else in my family. Exercise tends to be early morning before others are up but otherwise its about making sure that you aren't over scheduled- it's not just something that happens to kids!!
Do you work full time?
I also let my kids do 1 after school activity and swimming. It becomes very draining when you spread yourself to thin.
This was me a year ago. Work full time, cook, clean, ensure everyone else was looked after. I was so miserable.
It was always - how do I fit it all in?
I took a good hard look at finances, cut back my work hours. Bulk cooked a few nights a week to make weeknight dinners easy, and my partner looks after the kids while I go for an evening walk.
Look for easy, small changes that you can maintain. It's no good flipping your entire life upside down and realising it won't work after 1 week.
I love that other women can get up at 5am for a workout but that is a definate no from me haha. The changes have to agree with you. And find yourself a hobby. It can be anything at all that's just for you that you enjoy. Book times in for yourself. Treat it like an appointment.
Good luck. 😁
I feel like this when I'm working full time...on top of work i was the only one thinking about what all the kids needed...school..appointments.. walking dog..and so on...i felt exhausted !! Older kids can definitely help out but so can your partner!...have the conversation ... good luck!
I’m following this because I could have written this myself. Pretty much same situation with two daughters and one with anxiety which throws a whole other realm of exhaustion into the mix.
I think my problem is I don’t delegate enough at home. I take everything on myself and then stew up anger internally that no one helps, vicious cycle.
Good luck, you are not alone in your feelings ❤️
I started making lunches the night before and that made time in the morn for a walk. Your kids sound old enough to leave home on their own. It takes practice, choosing yourself, but once you do, dinner lunch washing will not seem as important. Choose you. While your kids are at their activities can you walk or ride for half an hour. Even 15 mins twice a day is enough to get you started. Walking has changed my life. Its free and you can do it anywhere. Choose you, no one else will.