Please help.
I realise I am lucky to have a job during this pandemic.
However, I work at a supermarket, where the majority of the public are NOT practising social distancing, and all we have to protect us workers is soap and hand sanitizer.
I have 3 teenage children to my ex husband. We have them 50-50.
He has decided to let them stay home instead of going to school. He will also be working from home very shortly, as his job can allow that.
I am petrified of contracting coronavirus. I feel like its basically a given, considering my job as a shelf stacker and constantly being around the public.
I am trying to work out whether I should let my ex have our kids until this tides over somewhat, as much as it is breaking my heart into a billion pieces.
My current partner and I have a 21 month old who lives with us and I am frightened for him too. I am tempted to hand him over to my inlaws to limit tje chance of him contracting it too.
My partner was horrified when I said I was tempted to take my 4 weeks leave, as his job is on the line to being stopped, and he is panicking about the money. A fair bit of my wage comes from working extra hours.
I just dont know what to do. My anxiety is through the roof
Seeing kids during covid-19 pandemic
Seeing kids during covid-19 pandemic
Posted in:
Health & Wellbeing, Kids
10 Replies
I’m so sorry you are in this position.
I think that if you have a good coparenting relationship (which it sounds like you might) have a chat with the kids dad and see what he thinks. Maybe he might agree that it's best to leave them in once place. Maybe download Skype and video call each day that you would normally have them, you can physically see them, check in and let their sibling say hi too. It's not permanent, just for now and everyone will know that you're just being a mama doing what her gut is telling her is best.
Luckily we do have a good co parenting situation, he wouldn't hesitate to have the kids more if it was for their own safety. I love the idea of Skype too.
Your older kids can probably stay with their dad more, if he is happy for that. Just have a chat. I don't k ow how I'd feel about my in laws looking after my 21 month old though... How old are your in laws and how strictly are they isolating themselves?? Are they fit enoygh to have a 21 month old on a full time basis?? That's a lot... such a tough situation and I feel for you
I feel you on this. I too am still working in a role where social distancing is not possible. The threat to my family weighs heavy on my heart. However so do the financial implications of 6 months without my income. It really is an impossible situation. My anxiety is through the roof.
I'd leave them there for now. Maybe until end of school holidays. Or once you take leave pick them up to go nt o yours for a week. No short visits or frequent changes. And play it by ear as to how the lockdown progresses, don't miss out on seeing your kids if this is going to be ongoing- they need normal and they really need their parents
There's no doubt it will be on going and lock down will mean it will be illegal to be our of your home's unless within strict reasons and guidelines and visiting loved ones isn't included as essential. So contacting them via video calls, Skype, voice call is even more important. Not physical visits and contacts. Just one visit could potentially kill.
Well if they declare a 12 week total lockdown I say go and visit your children before it begins.
I think you're so lucky to have a great relationship with dad and that he is in a position to stay at home. It does seem to be a great idea that the kids stay with him for a little while, noone will doubt your love for your kids making such a sacrifice for their health. Facebook, facetime, skype etc to keep in touch everyday, and keep yourself as safe as possible too.
I feel for you this must be super hard. Maybe try to remember that if all of you are young and healthy it’s unlikely to be the end of the world if you do contract it. Get the older kids to stay with their dad for a few weeks. You CAN still see them if you meet at a park for example and sit 1.5m away, or go for a walk / bike ride etc. I know it’s not the same if you can’t hug them but seeing them and chatting and catching up is better than nothing. Follow the guidelines for showering and washing clothes when you get home. I think your 21mth old would miss you too much and you should keep him at home. Maybe take 2 weeks leave over Easter and hopefully the current restrictIons will start to work to bring the infection rate down so you feel a bit better about being at work. Look into all the options for rent reduction / mortgage freeze, bill relief etc to reduce your household costs to take that pressure off. Food bills will be less without 3 teenagers in the house!