I've separated from my (mostly emotionally) abusive partner. Even though there is an intervention order in place somehow I have still allowed him to manipulate me and I had fallen for his tricks. He has even stayed the night a couple of times and had asked me to continue to send him loving messages, although he could not reply due to the order.
I put in a application to vary the order to take out the no communication so that we could speak more freely as he wanted. A police officer got back to me today on whether I need to attend court for it or not and she said she had spoken to him and he does want to vary it so we can speak about anything. I was dumbfounded. She then went on to say he doesn't want me to send him any messages regarding our relationship or messages saying I love him (which he asked me for!). I felt heartbroken and used all over again. And also, like a complete idiot! How could I be so stupid?
Anyway, I've realised the main reason I keep getting sucked back in is because I cannot bare the thought of having to give up my young daughter for any period of time! It breaks my heart! And I don't want her to be subjected to the same life that his son (from a previous relationship) has had.
How do I be ok with this? How can I get to a point where I can feel comfortable with him having her? And know that she will be cared for and safe?
Domestic violence and care of a child
Domestic violence and care of a child
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage, Behaviour, Baby & Toddler
4 Replies
You move on. And as for him having his daughter for visits, why shouldn’t he?
If you thought he was such a bad father to his son then why have a child with him.
We all make choices, you have to live with yours
Seems like a very narrow minded answer. Not helpful in the slightest.
Wow you do realise the damage domestic violence does to a child? Domestic violence is child abuse. You can't be emotionally or physically abuse and be a good parent. The abuse doesn't happen straight away in most cases and pregnancy has usually happened before you see the monster within.
You need to absolutely go no contact with this man!! He is a trying to make you look crazy to the police and you do not want to lose credibility with them. He is a narcissist. Don’t be too hard on yourself. You’re not an idiot. He is a predator. You are in a stronger position in family court with an intervention order in place.