Hi IMs,
I have been a relationship for five years. My boyfriend left me on Tuesday, clearing out all his things. We haven’t had a major fight, we haven’t had major problems. We resolved little things along the way. His reasons for leaving were superficial and mean, which is unlike him. - like not having dinner always prepared and not looking the same as I did when we got together - I have been through some stressful things but ultimately still feel beautiful and look after myself - I don’t want to fixate on these things either.
He worked away in the mines and his roster was difficult for both of us. I felt like I was waiting for him to come home and spending time with him a priority over myself at times, which I accepted knowing that it would even out over time. I know he has some influences from other men in the mines.
I’m in a world of pain right now. This is a relationship I poured so much love into and hung in there through good and bad times. I’m not perfect but I truly loved him and would’ve worked things out, whatever it was. It hurts me that he can’t/is choosing not to see that and appreciate it.
I’ve been going to work each day but it feels so hard. We had a home together and I haven’t been able to go back there much without being upset.
I thought this person would be in my life long-term. Part of me feels like he had deeper issues to work out on his own, that he may grow up and return. I’m not going to hold out for that, just sharing how I feel.
Any kind advice would be appreciated.
10 Replies
Break-ups hurt. It gets better. It’s bettter that he leaves now, than in another year. The kindest thing you can do for yourself is let him go and not try and pull him back.
Sometimes we don’t see who someone really is until they break up with us.
Let him go!
Sounds like he has met someone else and is being nasty or having shit reasoning so he doesn’t have to feel bad
Sounds like he has met someone else and is being nasty or having shit reasoning so he doesn’t have to feel bad
Sorry to say it happened to me they fly out partnered and eventually fly home single due to women out there I'm not generalizing but really young single women with no responsibilitys are like carrot and stick and the moral of men would not help it let him go before you hurt anymore it happens it changes them they start to unappreciated you and compare you because they have so much to compare you too but really your amazing and he will see one day but it's too late let him be you will thank him later
Sorry to keep up with the stereotype in this thread. But yeah, very common for miners to cheat. My dad started up this behaviour when he met another woman while working in a different state. His relationship with everyone in his family has been destroyed.
Sorry you're going through this but I'd say you're better off. Xx
If he's got to be that old without changing, he's not going to suddenly grow up and come back changed now. If this is truly out of character, then I'd be more worried about what else you didn't know about him.
He can't come back, I'd never trust him again. It's a very hard one to move on from when you get blindsided, but start believing he's not the great guy you thought and move on.
Darling those reasons you listed are bullshit, grieve cry your heart out. just remember you are beautiful Inside and out, from my personal experience FIFO workers were a no go zone and to much effort. Please not I am not being mean or hurtful
There liars cheaters and selfish men who destroy many a family let the looser free he will always be chained to his low morals go be happy get a non fifo person who can actually function in society
It's hard, but give yourself time to grieve and be sad. The truth will come out eventually as to why, so don't worry about that! Focus on yourself! DO NOT beat yourself up due to the reasons he gave you because they sound like cop outs!