I've been on here for quite some time
I just think this is hilarious
Ive watched so many posts now
I can see a scenario posted by a step-parent or father and everyone is in attacking mode
The I see a similar nearly identical post made by a Bio mum and everyone is having sympathy and being so nice what this world come to
10 Replies
I didn’t think anyone attacked her.
Co-parenting is HARD for both sides, she can’t change that the mother is jealous, she can change her interactions with the mother.
Ditto. No one is attacking. She's asking for feedback on why her current actions aren't well received (which is different to whether her intent is genuine)
Wasn't just implying on the last post actually on a lot of posts in the past six months
The thing that irks me about so many of these "step" posts is that people seem to either be hell bent on condemning step mum or are vehemently trying to defend bio mum (and vice versa).
Very few people actually even factor in how these dysfunctional and petty situations affect the children. If more mums, dads and partners put their emotions aside and actually focused on what's in the best interests of the kids, blending families would be a much smoother transition.
Was just talking about the responses here. People go on here to get advice not to get bullied. And I've seen a lot of post that are identical and step parent always gets blasted 'put yourself in Bio mums shoes' yeah and is someone trying to put themselves in fathers or step mums shoes? Even those two can have feelings for a child that a Bio mother has. And sometimes a Bio mother is lacking feelings that maybe the Bio dad has.
I feel like you may have misunderstood me, i was agreeing with you.
These step mum posts seem to end up with people debating or criticizing rather than giving objective, non biased advice.
Yes! I have been the "bio mum" for 6 years and often post here about problems I have been having with my kids step mum and I get supportive advice. I am now also a step mother and whenever I ask for advice here about my step kids or their bio mum I end up deleting it because it just gets blown up into something it's not. I get told I resent my stepkids, mind my own business and I shouldn't marry someone with kids if I can't handle them. This is all before it gets to Facebook! I feel like I have to explain every single detail to avoid people accusing me of being a bad stepmother. There is definately an "anti step mum" vibe here.
Totally agree, thank you
I've seen step mum posts where they have been responded to positively as well. Honestly, I don't see it as any different than any other post. Different people will have different thoughts about an issue. If you aren't seeking a variety of opinions so that you can weigh up each idea for yourself and draw your own conclusion.... Why post a question on a public forum?
I don't post here anymore about step kids. It's not so much the different opinions, I like those. It's the responses like "You sound really resentful of your step child" on a post that really did not give that impression at all. Also the "mind your own business it has nothing to do with you" as a caregiver to a child that lives with me then their well being kind of does have something to do with me. The only step parent posts that i have seen responded to well are posts where there isn't an actual problem, like "how can i help my stepdaughter if she gets her period at home" or "my stepson is allergic to dairy what can I put in his lunchbox". Posts about behaviour or problems with bio mum get terrible comments.