I’ve got an 18 month old daughter and lately it feels like all I’m doing is getting cranky at her. She is so challenging! I’m exhausted from dealing with her.
She is not a fan of day sleeps lately 🙁
I’m on my own with her every 2nd week as my husband works away.
I do get help from my mum sometimes.
I don’t give in to her all the time, she doesn’t always get what she wants. But lately it’s like when I say no she goes in to a tantrum, screaming and crying. And it’s almost like you can’t look at her the wrong way and she flips, sometimes I have no idea what sets her off. I’m finding myself losing my patience and she has had a few smacks lately.
She is also head butting things when she doesn’t get her way.
I think the fact that she can’t verbalize what she wants makes it hard to.
I always knew motherhood wouldn’t be easy but I just didn’t think it would be sooooo hard. I very much wanted this child when I feel pregnant as I suffered 3 losses prior to her, so she is very cherished. I love my daughter so much but sometimes I don’t like being around her. She can go from really sweet to really shitty in a matter of minutes.
I’m seriously considering getting my tubes tied. I did want another child but I don’t know if I can go though this again!
Does this all sound like normal toddler behavior? I don’t know how to cope with her or where to go for help.
Does it get a little bit easier?
Hope that made sense 🤪
Help please!
And please don’t tell me I shouldn’t have had kids, that is not helpful! I’m trying to do the best I can for my daughter.
8 Replies
I completely understand 😅 my daughter is now 2 and a few months and with her sudden increase in language skills the tantrums are finally decreasing! It gets better I promise!! Hang in there mumma!!
I will also say I had a son first and he didn’t tantrum like barely at all. So missy was a shock to the system, my point is don’t rush out and get your tubes tied they are all so different! I have a 3.5 year gap and it worked wonders for me! My son was quite independent by the time I was dealing with little miss demon hehe
I also have a 3.5yo gap between my daughter's and love it. My first was a nightmare and my second is a dream! 😂😂
We also have a 3.5 year gap!! It's the best. I would never have them closer in age!!
The way I see it is; we are never going to be amazing parents for every single age bracket our kids reach.
Like you, I’m not particularly patient with toddlers and I have found that the most challenging age for me. But I had a strong point with newborns and I’ll probably find more enjoyable ages as mine get older too.
But yep, toddlers = arseholes.
Hang in there. It does get better, and also, in the mean time, ask for help (or time away) when and where you need it. Just to regroup. It never hurts
Yep. Normal. They can be absolute shits. Ive got no great tips except time away from them, it's essential.
Routine and consistency!!!
Remain stubborn. You will win. But make sure there's some organised fun too so it doesn't feel strained
Check out Nurtured Heart Approach,and read Raising A Spirited Child just for starters.
When we know better, we do better.
Get as much help n support as you can, do parenting courses, speak to professionals, read, research, trial and error a few things. And most importantly, take regular time out for yourself, this shit is relentless, and you need to bring your A game!
My children now young adults, have autism, so I know a little about challenging behaviour 😉
We survived, but only because I changed a lot of things. I learnt more about my core beliefs, how my childhood affected me, I got help from professionals, I became a different parent, and adjusted to each of my child’s individual needs. Like so many on here, people told me to smack, and all this other out dated shit.... 🤦♀️
I think it’s worth having a chat to the maternal health nurse or GP, make a list of your concerns and see if they consider a referral to a paediatrician might be in order, just to check on developmental milestones, might be worth seeing a speech pathologist, occupational therapist or child psychologist.
Once you’ve learnt the Nurtered Heart Approach you’ll never ignore and walk away from your child again. It’s amazing, and it works! But you need to feel ready, reenergised and full of love. We get that by spending time away from the child. Put her into care once a week or get an au pair a few days a week. Don’t be a martyr and think you’ve gotta do this shit alone. If hubby isn’t on board, leave him for a week with her then see how he feels ...