Tomorrow I have court. Im feeling sick my PTSD is kicking in big time.
I took a restraining order out on my ex 3 years ago so that's why.
But this time I'm going because my partners ex took a restraining order out on us.
It's a long long story. But there is no reason why she had to. I never message her if I do it's to say stop messaging me. She's always harrasing me and my partner trying to break us up telling me they "fuck all the time" and all that. Always turning up to his house going oh she's her I thought you wanted me to come round and have sex. We have had enough but I guess we were stupid not to take a restraining order out on her. We didn't want to split the family up like that but now she's done it.
I was pregnant last year which she did not know about but continue to harras me by calling and messaging all day and night and sadly we lost the baby because of the stress. It's something I will never forgive her for.
I've been going to courses over the past few years about family violence and the effects it has on children and how to over come it. Why would I commit it or even be with someone like that when I have children of my own! I'm so angry as well.
How can I calm my self down?
Court was so awful last time with my ex and I was the respondent now I'm in the other shoes. And for complete lies. Like I bashed my partner up in front of their kids and I sware at them and cause her complete stress and worry.
She has also told my ex that she will not be there on the day because she doesn't want to go. Doesn't this mean it won't go ahead. We have seen 2 lawyers and they have said 2 different things?
Thank you for listening to me vent.
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4 Replies
Please don’t get pregnant to your partner again, until this is all sorted. I can’t understand for the life of me why you haven’t blocked her and why your partner hasn’t dealt with her and allowed her to abuse you. Is this relationship worth all the heart ache to you and more importantly your children? I would have told him I am not moving in and blending families with the kids until you have dealt with your past. You need to deal with the dirty laundry bdore you start something new. Now you are in this situation, all you can do is be honest with the judge about what’s gone on and hope for the best. If things don’t settle down, I would seriously consider leaving. You realise her allegations could cause you to lose your own kids, is it worth it for a weak man that allows his ex to abuse you?
Great advice. From my experience when your life is going to shit, its ongoing, you cant sort it, you dont know whats really going on & you need to look at the people closest to you to figure out why.
As for court go in with facts, calm and proud and if shes not there thats great for you.
I also think your past dv has been a factor as to why you have put up with this bs. I wish you could see your own self worth and see that you don’t deserve to be a part of this toxic situation. You need calm and peace after all you have been through. If you aren’t, I suggest seeing a professional, good luck lovely.