Hi I need some advice about letting go of my 17 year old son. He has just got his first girlfriend well good news you would think but no not really he met her... well she slid into his Snapchat messages a few weeks back now but 4 days prior to her messaging him she had a really awful experience which no woman should have to go through!! I won't go into detail it's not for me to discuss. Anyway after messaging for a day he met her and spent all day with her which is still no problem right but he told us that she's sent nudes of the downstairs area after 2 days (2 days) he spent all of his remaining wages about £150 in a week 2 weeks before pay day on her this is all in the first week of him knowing her!! But this is the kicker now last week her ex boyfriend has come back on the scene after just passing his drivers test with a car now he has been ferrying my son and the gf around for 2 days which I myself find a bit strange (with the ex really) now after 2 days of this my son gets a message that she needs time to think and break which is understandable considering what she's been through but literally the night before his said payday she gets back in touch and wants him to meet her at a local shopping area now the 2 days she needed space she has still be driving around with said ex!!! But my son says he gets her that's why they are still friends(right) but yesterday my son proceeds to spend all his monthly wage more or less on her oh and the ex went halves with he clothes they spent on her!! Now am I been an overprotective mum who sees this girl as been a user and not a very self respecting person and I really don't like everything that she seems to be doing to my son he bikes after work which he starts at 4am 6 days a week a 12 mile round trip everyday and she won't even meet him half way she is showing nothing at liking my son apart from what he has and he's silly and splashes out coz in his words he's been a good boyfriend!!! He says he's happy and believe me I want nothing more than to see him happy but am I an idiot here and does she sound like she's proper taking the piss and because he has rose tinted glasses on he can't see it!!
The main thing is should I just leave him to get on with it and literally sit back and watch as I can see him well and truly getting hurt and let go just be there for support ( not I told you sos) help I need advice let go or get involved ??? Help me
Sorry if none of this makes sense I need to know really let go or keep telling him what she's doing xx
Help me do I let go or not!!
Help me do I let go or not!!
Posted in:
Teenagers, Tips and Advice, Dating & Sex
5 Replies
Oh, she is definitely using him, but the worst thing you can do is go in all guns blazing.
This is a lesson he probably has to learn the hard way. Just like many women and teen girls who are in abusive relationships.
You can ask him how he is doing and what he thinks about how she’s treating him.
She is using him. They are using him together. They are prob on drugs and scamming money from your son. Be straight up he needs to get rid of her. Get his friends to talk to him anyone. She’s a user.
Keep fighting for your son!
You're not wrong, she definitely sounds like a piece of work. Unfortunately if you try and tell him the truth it will probably backfire on you and push him closer to her. I would just keep subtly reminding him of things that aren't right, like it's funny how she messages you on pay day but you don't hear from her any other time isn't it? Is she back with her ex again, they're always together? Pull her up on what she's doing without being too confrontational, make it sound like it's coming from a place of concern. Good luck.
He'll have to learn for himself. He'll have a whole month now of being broke and watching where she goes.
Don't push him or he'll go to her.
Support him and be on his side. Don't mention her or what you think, just that you trust him and the brain he's got.