Hey Mums,
I'll keep it short.
How do you know when its time to seperate?
Firstly, No, we're not throwing this away, we love each other and have worked our arses off to make it work but nothing ever changes.
We have had the same financial issues for 15 years that never change no matter what.
We've recently changed back to having our own accounts rather then joint accounts to try see if that will make a difference by, big surprise, it hasn't. I'm slightly better off, hes a long way worse.
It has come up in discussion if seperating would be better in the long run as the kids are starting to suffer, they miss out on things and they now see and feel the money tension.
I know being a single mum is hard, I do and I've raised the kids all but alone with him being a FIFO worker (not the same as single I know) but neither of us want the kids future to suffer caus of our choices and honestly, I can unfortunately see how it might benefit us if we were seperated.
Help! This sucks about as much as adulting!!
Seperation
Seperation
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage, Self Care, Parenthood Guilt, Kids, Money
5 Replies
I could have written this. No advice unfortunately but goodluck with whichever path you go on xx
Thank you so much xx
Good luck to you too xx
Can you get some sort of financial guidance from a professional? To help you both with budgeting etc?
Barefoot Investor. Read it together and follow it!!!!!!
My mum has always said there are ants and grasshoppers when it comes to money. The ant saves and plans, he grasshopper just lives large and leans on the ants. My husband was shocking with money, was carefree and careless as a young person, and to some extent is still not great. we have seperate accounts, and have clear responsibilities around money. He pays the entire mortgage, his car and phone and spending money. I would cover the numerous small bills. I am the ant, the saver the planner , he has never been that. So by covering the big bills then i can save cash for the other stuff that comes up. He also has money every week go into super again as he isnt a saver but this is done before he sees the money and can't get to it. That said recently he has started to put money in his savings account and has over $10k which is great. However I know that if something he really wants comes up he would spend it. I was also raised to have a run fund .... not everyone's thing but i have always stuck a little bit of money in this account, makes me feel safe financially if something was to go wrong, but if i wanted to ever leave i had the dollars to pick up and go. I am very independent but love my husband so this is how we made it work . Married 17 years so understand the stress . I have also heard FIFO men are worse fro spending as they have the "I earn good money" mentality.... Good luck do what you need to