I went to the pub for a meal and asked for a glass of wine. I was refused service because I am heavily pregnant and the staff “weren’t comfortable” with it, I questioned her and said it wasn’t illegal, but they still refused and I was humiliated in front of everyone in the dining area.
I understand that it’s a personal choice to drink while pregnant, but I’m over 18 and I wasn’t intoxicated. I’m still angry about it.
Did they have any right to do that to me? Or was I discriminated against based on a personal opinion?
Was I discriminated against?
Was I discriminated against?
Posted in:
Pregnancy
44 Replies
They are within their legal right to refuse to serve you alcohol
If a persons judgement puts others at risk then the choice shouldn’t be there own!
Have you reserved feral alcohol syndrome?
No sympathy! But I’d shake the hand of the person who refused you.
Researched
What a troll post. Clearly you're Australian, you wouldn't come on here complaining that you didn't get served alcohol while pregnant and expect to not get blasted.
What exactly does being Australian have to do with this?
Ummm I said obviously she is Australian because I can spot written ESL when I see it. In Australia it is a massive no to drinking while pregnant, we get it drummed into us everywhere and even those that do drink can't be bothered with the backlash so would keep it quiet!
Hence why I think it's really odd for a pregnant Australian to be complaining about not being served alcohol on a mum forum because they would know very well they aren't getting any sympathy.
It is still socially acceptable to drink in small amounts in many other countries. Which is why at first I thought she may be from another country, but no, clearly Australian.
Do I need to keep explaining or...
Working in the hospitality industry, I actually don't think it's a troll - just another entitled person who thinks they've been wronged. You would be shocked at how many pregnant women drink and how many get all bent out of shape about it when they get refused.
Also, this is the second time today I've seen someone make sweeping generalisations about Australians, what's the deal with that?
That’s why I asked, the last one was about our men all being derogatory pigs. Now all pregnant women in Australia live to drink
Someone thinks we're all uncivilized barbarians apparently 🙄😂
I don't believe that commenter was inferring that being Australian = feral drinker.... I think they were saying she is most likely Australian by the way she is writing (eg. Not ELS) and in Australia we are well aware that we shouldn't drink when pregnant.
Well you must be an imported feral.
This has to be a troll. Surly no women is this stupid to still be drinking while pregnant, then actually cracking the shits when a bar tender refuses. Could you imagine, you go to the pub for a nice meal with your family and have to watch a heavy pregnant women being shitty because they won’t let her get on the piss.
Most bars have signs saying they deserve the right to refuse alcohol for any reason.
Considering It's well documented the awful, lifelong effects even small amounts of alcohol has on babies, sympathy will be thin on the ground, I'm afraid.
A lot of judgemental bitches on here
Yep! It’s bloody disgusting.
I actually thought it was ok to have an occasional glass of red wine🤷🏻♀️
Latest research shows otherwise unfortunately 🤷
No it doesn't.
NO safe limits have been established hence abstaining the safest option. We simply can't say whether 2, 4, 8 etc drinks will cause various issues with a developing baby/newborn. Plenty of research out there including from Australia and overseas 🤷
https://www.nhmrc.gov.au/file/1641/download?token=Eu_c2Agj
No same as there's nothing to say plenty of other things do not cause damage. That doesnt mean they do. Hence being personal choice. I'm sure you've done something whilw pregnant that others thought was incredibly reckless and dangerous, does their opinion on it carry any weight to you? Imagine if they confronted you about it in public.
The question is a legal one, not a moral one.
Personally, nope I didn't. My pregnancies were after years and years of infertility and miscarriages 🤷 and I wasn't about to put them in any jeopardy.
The studies show that alcohol is detrimental to developing and new born babies, but we cannot tell just how much alcohol is actually safe.
I didn't do anything remotely at risk of harm to my baby.
In someone else's opinion, you did. Interesting you lack that ability to see that. It's not as black and white as you think.
Yes it does. If you can’t go without a drink for the sake of your baby’s health, you don’t deserve to have a baby.
Fuck some women are judgemental bitches.
Fuck theres some real dickheads out there, who goes out of their way to drink alcohol when they're aware they're pregnant 🙄🤷♀️
Look, it get it. Pregnancy is hard but the most current research shows that there are actually NO safe levels of drinking. Even a small amounts of alcohol can harm an unborn and newborn baby. It must've been a pretty feeling though to be confronted like that at the pub.
Here is some more info: https://www.health.gov.au/health-topics/alcohol/alcohol-throughout-life/...
Opinions aside I don’t think “pregnancy” is a protected class and a bar has the right to refuse service to anyone they feel that isn’t protected by anti-discrimination laws. I imagine I’d be more humiliated sitting there drinking wine at 9 months pregnant to be honest.
Leaving my personal opinion out of it, and married to a current licensee: legally, they cannot refuse to serve you unless you're obviously intoxicated or a minor.
Should probably brush up on their license then - legally they have the right to refuse service to anyone for any reason.
Alcohol consumption in pregnancy is very common according to Australian research. High consumption has significant risk. Research can't determine whether low consumption holds risk or not... hence the recommendation to abstain. However, because of the lack of evidence re low level drinking, it is illegal to refuse service to a pregnant woman over 18 if they're not intoxicated. Personally, my biggest issue with 1 glass as a once off is everyone else's judgement. Even when I was offered, fear of judgement had me decline.
https://www.health.gov.au/resources/pregnancy-care-guidelines/part-c-lif...
Stop telling people it’s illegal. It’s not. They have the right to refuse service to anyone, whether they’re intoxicated or not.
Rsa is state not federal. The laws are different in each state
I used to work in a small local licenced venue.
Legally I couldn't refuse to serve pregnant women but I believe the legalities may vary state by state, so if you really want to persue this you may need to speak with a lawyer.
But before you do that, ask yourself if this employee REALLY deserves to lose their job because they (perhaps miguidedly) cared enough about your unborn baby and did what they believed was the right thing to do?
There were many times where I wished I could refuse to serve some of our regulars who were hurting themselves or other people with their drinking. Just try and appreciate how hard that is to witness on a daily basis.
I'm not trying to guilt you or anything, just trying to offer a bit of perspective here and perhaps suggest that maybe you should let this one slide...
Hahaha I'm crying with laughter at some of these coments, 🤣🤣🤣, just because someome posts something controversial and it hurts your speechless souls, doesn't mean they are a troll. 🤣🤣🤣. Wake up! You don't have to agree to her having one glass of wine but she's hardly trolling 🤣🤣
Sounds like the same group of women who post all the 'leave him' and 'they are a narsisist' comments. As that's usually also an answer when people don't know what else to say. The troll comment is no different. Pack of Drongo's on here calling out 'troll'. 🤣
What the hell do u think u are doing thinking it’s ok to have at least one alcoholic drink while pregnant I’m sorry but what I feel you don’t deserve this baby if you can’t keep sober while pregnant even one drink could do some harm
They have a right to refuse service.
I can't believe you're asking not to be judged for this... ie I'm drinking alcohol while pregnant AND whinging about discrimination.
So drink while you're pregnant and live with the consequences or risks. I don't care. Not my problem. Why not go do some crack while you're at it. Shouldn't make too much of a difference...
... wait, you're going to say "but those are drugs! I'd never put my baby through that! What kind of a mother does drugs while pregnant?"
Yeah, says mom drinking alcohol and whining about being discriminated against.
If the bar staff did adhere to your request and (god forbid) your baby was affected by FAS (whatever studies show, be it low or high levels of alcohol consumption), would you look to take legal action upon them that they served you alcohol when quite obviously pregnant and lacked their duty of care? What you do in your own home is your business, if you choose to have a drink or not. But a licenced venue and their staff personally can have repercussions should something go wrong.
This is what RSA is. It protects servers, as long as they follow it they are within the law and protected.
Yes you were discriminated against. As you said you weren’t intoxicated. Ive had an occasional glass of wine when pregnant so no judgement here
They can refuse service to anyone in their establishment.
If you want to drink while heavily pregnant, without the looks of disapproval and comments from others who don't agree with your choice. Do it at home.
I personally think it's horrible that you can't go a few months without alcohol to ensure the health of your unborn child.
I haven't read any other comments, but I can tell you from the servers point of view, I wish I'd had the courage and support from management to refuse service to pregnant woman when I knew it was for them! I have had many experiences watching heavily pregnant woman knock back a few 'harmless beers' and felt sick to my stomach. You're heavily pregnant, if having a wine is that important save it for when you get home. I'm glad you were humiliated, so you should be because I can guarantee you every single person in that establishment would have felt worse watching you drink it. I'm not normally one to judge or even bother commenting on posts like this, but this is ridiculous that you even have to ask. Troll perhaps? Either way, grow up.
No you were not discriminated against, I would NEVER serve a pregnant women alcohol either. This year we lost 2 babies and what I would give to have them back , sorry this is so selfish of you to risk your child's health for a glass of wine.
Get the fuck over it!!!