Child support issues

Anonymous

Child support issues

My ex is being super manipulative and I just don't know what to do anymore. We sold my car when we were together to buy a brand new one when we split I got his old one but now his threatened that his going to ring the police and report the car stolen unless I change child support to a private agreement so he doesn't have to pay. I don't know what to do because I need that money to be able to afford our son's specialist appointments and all his medications but at the same time I need a car to be able to get to all the appointments. He doesn't help with our son even when IV begged him and I'm just beyond exhausted and at breaking point now. What do I do?

Posted in:  Relationships & Marriage

15 Replies

Anonymous

I went through exactly this when my son had a badly broken leg and appointments were 3 hours away. In the end I got so sick of the blackmail I told him to shove his car up his ass so then he had car repayments plus had to pay full child support too so he only shot himself in the foot with that move. He had to take our child to his appointments and I used child support money to buy a car for our kids. He really doesn't want the car back, he wants you to feel like you need it enough to go on a private agreement. Give it back, it will be hard for a while but you will manage. Start saving for another car or look at getting a loan for one. Don't give him something to hold over your head.

like
Anonymous

Don’t change it to a private agreement whatever you do.

like
Anonymous

1. You sort out the car.
2 you ignore him and collect chile support. Do not go private and have him not paying.
Keep the two issues separate. If youve split you need to finalise the splitz sort out the car and anything else thats still in his name and not sorted and be done with him

like
Anonymous

I’d record him next time he says that, so if he does report it stolen you can show the police that and they’ll know he’s being a manipulative jerk.

like
Anonymous

You know it’s illegal to record somebody with out telling them you are doing it before hand right?

like
Anonymous

Really? So he can threaten her constantly, but your worried about him being recorded cause it’s illegal 😂.

like
Anonymous

Well she can record him but it will only back fire on her if she tries to use it in anyway.

like
Anonymous

Not true. You’re allowed to record someone without them knowing in most states, as long as the person recording is also part of the conversation

like
Anonymous

Did you do a financial settlement? Why did you not transfer the car right away into your name when you split? If you got one car and he got the other then the names should have been changed on the rego forms so you both had your own regos to pay. Is the “new car” in both your names? Have you taken your name off of that?

Do not go private child support collect. Organise the financial settlement and go from there. Do not bend to his will and if anything contact the police in your town and talk to them about it. If you aren’t doing anything wrong don’t feel scared at talking to them. I have multiple special needs children

like
Anonymous

Going to the police will accomplish nothing. He hasn’t done anything wrong. I’m not sure what you want them to do? Police are there to help you when your in trouble, not to sort out relationship issues

like
Anonymous

Going to the police before they come to you accusing you of stealing a car you haven’t stolen because your ex is a jerk is absolutely the right thing to do. It’s a civil matter. They really shouldn’t intervene anyway. But incase they have to intervene then she’s alerted them to the fact it is a civil matter and she is in the process of attempting to get her car into her name.

She could also go to them for his attempt at blackmailing her into doing what he wants. Either way she’s made them aware of the situation and she should also make CSA aware of the situation and if she has it in a text message she could forward it to them to help her case. She should also attempt recovery of the new vehicle especially if it’s partially in her name if he continues on the path of being a looser who wishes not to support his child. 🤷‍♀️

like
Anonymous

Let him call the police and look like a fool. He sounds like a right arsehole. My ex did this but I was going through a lawyer. And she got him sign my car over, so I had a vehicle to drive his babies around in. You need to seek advice through a lawyer. Pls DONT do a private agreement. Goodluck with everything it’s a long rd but you’ve got this 💪 xx.

like
Anonymous

I went through similar with my ex. My car was in his name because that’s the only way he would allow me to have my own car. A few months after we split I had the police turn up at my house with reports I had stolen HIS car. I explained everything, but if I didn’t want to get charged I had to return the car. Even though I paid for it, paid the rego and the up keep because it was in his name, technically it was his car and it had to be returned

like
Anonymous

Don't know if its everywhere but police in WA will not accept stolen reports within domestic situations and you also can't report something stolen if you lent it to them to begin with. I guess they had enough of the bullshit and people using them to fight their fights. If this is in WA he will need to see a lawyer not the police unless you hand it back yourself.

like
Anonymous

Let the car’s rego run out, get a roadworthy done on it and change the ownership of it while it’s unregistered.

like