I need help!
I have a beautiful family, a partner, 2 girls who are the best and I have a pretty a great job. I struggle with really bad anxiety, I generally don't want to go home because it's a massive trigger for me. I LOVE my kids, they are happy and I always ensure I am masking my feelings around them but I just can't stop the feeling of not wanting to be here anymore but my kids are what stops me. My partner is amazing, mostly. He helps out and would do anything for me but he can be so hurtful sometimes. Tonight he asked me why I am so stupid because I asked of he was going to get off his phone and watch a movie with me that I had been waiting half an hour to start... He calls me all tge names hnder tge sun and just doesn't care. I would never swear at him so what makes it okay for him to. I have been seeing a psych on and off but she makes me feel awful. I don't know what to do and I can't continue this way. This is not a moment in time thing or as a result of my partner something that had been eating at me for a long time.
Please help me, please no negative comments it's the last thing I could deal with tonight.
4 Replies
If your psychologist makes you feel bad then I’d start there. What about them makes you feel bad? Are they not very nice to you? Do they make you feel like you are being silly? Do they look down on you? Or is it that you are talking about some uncomfortable topics and feelings and that makes you feel bad.
If it’s uncomfortable topics, feelings and past I’m sorry, I find I’m always exhausted after my appointments but the over all benefit is worth it to me. If they generally make you feel bad about yourself it’s time for a new psychologist.
Have you discussed medications with your GP? It might be time.
I know you don’t want to hear this, but your partner is part of the problem. He is verbally abusive and it’s hard to stay mentally well while living in an abusive relationship. You might already have struggled anxiety before but your relationship will make it much harder for you to climb out of the hole and you at some point are going to have to address that issue.
PS I alway worry when I read posts that describe some kind of abuse, I always wonder if there is some other kind of abuse that’s going on that the poster hasn’t recognised yet and so isn’t describing. I really hope that’s not your situation.
This 100%
I feel so bad for the poster, there's still much work ahead but there's always that light at the end of the tunnel and we have to keep working towards it no matter how hard the decisions are that get us there.
Your poor girl. I know how awful anxiety is. You need to change psychologists ASAP. You also may need to move out of your home away from your partner and have some time out with you and your girls to see if that’ helps. He shouldn’t be calling you names. That’s degrading and mental abuse which wouldn’t help with your anxiety at all. Look at different medications and join some exercise club. Kick boxing was great for my anxiety and running on the beach or just a walk on my own. It all helps. Hope you feel better soon. Pack your bags and leave with your girls next time he calls you names.
I also think your partner is part of you problem.