Advice on Christmas present

Anonymous

Advice on Christmas present

Hi sisterhood. I'm reaching out for some advice on Christmas presents.
My 13yr old is begging me for an iPhone 8 and this is the 2nd year in a row she's asked for it. Last year I insisted she wasn't getting it. Too expensive, too much for a then 12 year old, waste of money, didn't want to spoil her and give in to her wants etc etc.
This year same argument, it's literally all she wants.
Yes the price is less than last year, but I still feel it's spoiling her and setting her up for a lifetime of ask and you shall receive mentally.
It's not a financial issue as to why I don't want to buy it, it's more an ethical one.

She has a iPhone 6 already but it's getting old, but I just feel trying to justify a $900+ purchase on 1 item for Christmas is just too much.

Now I'm her defence, she's an amazing kid, does everything I ask of her, helps out, etc she's doing well at school etc.

Given I have said no last year and made her wait another year, is that sufficient to reward her now for being patient and a good kid???

Or is it still too much and this is just spoiling her?

Posted in:  Parenthood Guilt

8 Replies

Anonymous

I think if you can afford it buy it. Sell the 6 to get some money back. If you told her a year well you should keep your promise.

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Anonymous

I think really why not. If she is awesome reward that too.. she is only asking for the 8 it’s not like she is expecting the 10 or 11...
Maybe even check the buy swap pages if you want to make it cheaper. It’s. It like she is getting it for nothing. It’s xmas. It’s a lesson in responsibility.

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Anonymous

I hate iPhones, they are the biggest money sucking scam out there! She will be asking for a new one every year, not because she's spoilt but because they're designed to crap out as the new models come in! I have an older one that was given to me after my android broke and it's the shittest phone I've ever had because it's so slow and glitchy, and there's hardly any apps that work on it! Buy her an 8 she will be asking for a new one by the end of the year. Thats just my personal experience with them, and I also have 4 teenagers and phones get broken all the time. Screens on an iPhone cost twice as much as any other phone and twice as easy to break. You would think with the price you pay you should be able to bounce it off the bitumen and it look brand new, they only need a slight tap and they're done. My daughter is iPhone obsessed and I refuse to fund any of it, if she wants them she can save her money and buy it. Forget about those protective cases too because they look stupid apparently. Rant over 😂.

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Anonymous

Yep! I refuse to spend that kind of money on a phone for myself so there is no way I would be getting one for either of my teens. If they want one, they save up to get it themselves.

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Anonymous

Personally, my kids won't be getting fancy, big brand phones until they are old enough to pay for them themselves. In my situation though, it's an affordability issue (I have 3 kids close in age and I promised them all a phone for 12th birthdays which will be back to back) and I don't even have a fancy iPhone 😂

However, I took this stance with my sons ps4. It was all he desperately wanted. We made it clear, the ps4 was the gift but maintaining the necessary running cost (games, online memberships, season passes etc) was his responsibility that he'd have to do extra chores to earn money for.

Maybe you could go with that sort of approach - phone is a gift but the credit/bill will need to be earnt. She gets what she wants but is still learning responsibility and hard work etc.

And if you're worried about what people will think, stuff 'em! They don't earn your money or raise your kids 😉

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Anonymous

My kids have a cheap phone that calls and texts - they don't need anything else and if they want an expensive phone with all the bells and whistles they can save their money and buy it themselves. I personally dont see any reason for kids to have expensive smartphones until they are much older

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Anonymous

I’ve got a 12 year old boy who will need a mobile next year.
Finances are an issue for me and he wants an iPhone and I have a cheap Telstra phone.
I feel so much better reading these, he made out like he would be the only kid without an iPhone.
Thanks ladies, I’m not the OP, but you just made me more confident in my decision not to get one.
To the OP, your daughter sounds like my son, a great person, if finances aren’t an issue, I would probably get her one.

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Anonymous

I would have brought it already lol, my son asked last year when he was 13 and I said no for all the reasons you did. Brought other presents then the week before Christmas decided I wanted him to have it. For all the same reasons, he is just such a good kid, does well at school, helps out etc and can I say it was so worth every dollar spent. His reaction was priceless (and it's hard to get that reaction from teenagers at Christmas, they just don't have the same excitement they did as little ones) and he has cherished and loved that phone for every day of the year he has had it. This year he has asked for 3 Xbox games, comes to about $120 for Christmas. Totally not at all expecting another $1000 present, not spoilt and he isn't ruined from that one year I made his Christmas with a really expensive gift 😉

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