My son’s best friends brother (let’s call him Frank) has a range of special needs, I won’t name them as it may identify him but it is quite common for Frank to be extremely violent towards his 3 siblings and his parents. And now given my sons close friendship with Franks brother, this translates into my son also being hit, kicked, sworn at, spat on. My son woke up to Frank standing over him in the night one time which was incredibly frightening for him.
My son is an only child and doesn’t cope well with this, he’s 11 and Frank is only 7 but is almost the same size. Franks other two other siblings are younger again and also subjected to the violence.
My son and Franks brother are very close, they play sport together and are in the same class. However, Frank and his behaviour towards my son is definitely creating tension in the friendship and my son has refused many times to be with his friend if Frank is going to be there.
And I don’t blame him. Every time my son comes home in tears or with a new bruise or tells me how he has had to be locked in a room or how he had to punch him back it breaks my heart.
Am I the asshole if I stop encouraging this friendship outside of school hours? My heart breaks for Franks family but I honestly feel like I need to protect my son by helping him keep his distance. I would obviously not interfere just start making suggestions to extend his friendship group. Thoughts?