Single mums - how the f do you do it?
I'm falling apart trying to work full time, be a mum and run a house. I'm failing and exhausted. I'm recovering from major surgery that's been emotionally and physically horrible but been cleared to work and do normal activities again.
I don't have a village and my ex initiates very little with the kids. I have to ask him to do things with the kids.
I'm failing at life and I feel like screaming!
How do you do it without having a breakdown?
I just need some support. I'm emotional triggered by my ex and I'm angry.
I'm angry for our amazing kids and I'm angry that he does not have any consideration for me at all. How do you care so little for someone who you lived with for so long?
How do you cope? How do you not lose your shit constantly? How do you keep hope things are going to improve? How do you have time for self care? How do you function?
I feel like a shit mum at the moment. I just need support and my options are to move near support but then I look like the alienator and ruin my kids lives for changing their schools or continue this lifestyle of working myself into the ground. I do everything for these kids, they are my life and I don't want them to suffer but how do I get something to let up???
Single mums how do you do it??
Single mums how do you do it??
Posted in:
Mental Health, Self Care, Parenthood Guilt
3 Replies
Here’s the honest truth. I didn’t do it all.
The house was often a mess and a lot of the time I was putting out metaphorical fires.
It got easier when I decided to simplify everything.
I made a decision to only cook 3 times a week and just reheat leftovers the other nights. We had to cut back on extra curricular activities and the kids had to help.
That meant the kids learning how to use the washing machine, operate the vacuum cleaner and learning how to dust.
I also got rid of a lot of excess stuff, clothes, shoes, and toys. I found we became a lot tidier, happier and less chaotic when we had less.
But right now, you need to be kind to yourself. You may be physically cleared for work, but that doesn’t mean you don’t need more rest than usual.
Ok you have a whole lot going on. On top of that I'm not sure how old your kids are and how much they help/hinder.
1. When you recover from your surgery you'll do better.
2. When you get out of the emotional stuff with ex you'll do better.
3. When you sort custody and have nothing else to do with him you'll do better.
As for working full time, that's really hard. It's stressful, if you can cut down even a day it will help you. It's all about balance and having good things going on and good things to look forward to.
You dont suck at all, you're really under it right now and nobody is meant to do everything you're doing alone. Youre killing it, be kind to yourself, and your kids.
I sooooo get you right now ❤️
Nothing to offer, but I’m right there with you, completely exhausted, single full time working mum.