How do I move past the lies?

Anonymous

How do I move past the lies?

How do I move past the lie?
On Monday night just past my partner of 9 yrs got absolutely smashed and confessed to a number of things that have happened since having our daughter 6 yrs ago. He spoke about how on a workers conference he went out drinking with the boys where he picked a women up, as a group they went to the strippers and casino, when the night was winding down the women offered my partner her room key in which he told me he declined 'cause he isn't a shit c**t and wouldn't do that to me'. Next story he told me was on another work trip he went out drinking with his mate where he met a bartender from the same small town as us only 2 yrs younger, now I'm currently in the 3rd trimester of pregnancy with our second (which due to my own fertility issues has been a very massive event), he suggested a name a while ago which I really like which he then adamantly rejected even thinking about said name, turns out it was the barmaids name from this work trip that he went drinking with! He then tells me she had to leave early in the night but gave him her contact details in which he says 'I didn't contact her as I'm not a shit c**t'. Following this only 2 weeks ago we went on a much deserved family holiday (which was my first days off in I don't know how long - uni, working 2 jobs equalling fulltime, moving and squeezing in pregnancy appointments I don't get much time for anything!) He went out to an October fest event with mates in which he ended up enjoying the evening with a women 10yrs his senior!! The night ended with a kiss !!!
I have only just found out all this from him being smash AF!!! Once he passed out I checked his phone and found out he was still friends with this women on Facebook!!!

The next day he has said everything except the October fest story isnt true.. and that their was the barmaid girl but nothing happened at all including no exchange of contact information.

I honestly have no idea what to think, what to do, what to believe!! My body has just shut down. I really have no idea what I'm asking, maybe for some validation in my feelings, maybe for someone to say I'm being stuiped it was just a kiss... I don't know I'm just lost

10 Replies

Anonymous

Your partner is in fact a massive shit cunt! The truth ALWAYS comes out, especially when drunk. It’s obviously happened 3 times that he has admitted too. How many more times are you willing to put up with?

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Anonymous

Move him out. No thanks. Bye.

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Anonymous

What an absolute arsewipe he is.

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Anonymous

Yep, he’s a shit c$nt

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Anonymous

I’m absolutely fine with my hubby going out and talking to other women but I think swapping contact details is a line for me and so to physical contact.

You need to draw your line and see what you can and can NOT live with!

I’d be leaving the “shit cunt” tbh even for using that term/language I’d consider it.

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Anonymous

Lying coward is trying to offload his shit c@#$t crap on you and what's worse doing it offloading when your pregnant because he feels guilty ! I had a shit one too and it happened again and again and again and now he is someone else's shit ..... get rod of him your not stupid you just realised what stupid you are living with ! He has kids and jr is a shit person he knows it and is either feeling guilty and wants out maybe let him have it so sorry for you but do not stay another 1 with this man! He must be some catch any time he goes out all the women flock to him , real shit person and family man is what he is

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Anonymous

Possible he's about to be caught out so thats why admitted it. Definitely better to do while pregnant as you won't leave him.
Don't for one second believe he did it out of any good intent. If he suddenly had good intent, he would have changed himself. He's been doing this the whole time up until recently. I would say very high chance someone sprung him and told him they would tell you. He got hammered knowing he was going to do it. No accidents, he's a shit cunt alright. Anyone who does this is. And you don't deserve this.

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Anonymous

Lying coward is trying to offload his shit c@#$t crap on you and what's worse doing it offloading when your pregnant because he feels guilty ! I had a shit one too and it happened again and again and again and now he is someone else's shit ..... get rod of him your not stupid you just realised what stupid you are living with ! He has kids and jr is a shit person he knows it and is either feeling guilty and wants out maybe let him have it so sorry for you but do not stay another 1 with this man! He must be some catch any time he goes out all the women flock to him , real shit person and family man is what he is

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Anonymous

He got super drunk, got a sudden attack of the guilts and spilled his guts. Now he's sobered up he's gone into damage control mode.

So which version of him are you gonna believe?
The one whose honesty flows out like verbal diarrhea or the one who's really good at keeping things from you?

What you need to take from this is that he's got a serious problem with boundaries and a pretty fucked up relationship with truth and honesty at the very least!
He's made himself available to these ladies but then stops just before he takes it to the next level because he's "not a shit cunt" but perhaps he either doesn't realise or doesn't care that taking things beyond platonic friendliness does make him a shit cunt - both to you and these other unsuspecting girls.

I can't tell you how to get past that. I personally don't think i could or would want to get past that but this is your journey so whatever comes next is entirely up to you.

My advice going forward. Look at everything as it is! Don't ignore red flags, take off your rose coloured glasses, don't disregard your feelings or your personal limits of what you will and will not tolerate in your relationship!

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Anonymous

Safe to say your partner is a shit cunt. He will just keep doing it

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