Why are people so cruel

Anonymous

Why are people so cruel

My daughter is 5, she had never known her bio dad and the only dad she knows is my partner, she calls his parents nan and pop, his siblings aunt and uncle and she had been accepted by everyone in the family except for one brothers partner

I’ve been with my partner for 4.5 years he has helped raise my daughter and she is his child as far as he’s concerned, his parents say they have four grandkids one from us and three from his brother

However, the brothers partner is making it hard for my little girl, when it’s her birthday or at Christmas she doesn’t receive a gift from then as she isn’t family, this woman has told her children that my daughter isn’t family nor will she ever will be

My daughter doesn’t understand what she did to not fit in ( she knows that my partner isn’t her bio dad, but she knows that it’s the person that raises you is your dad)

I need to know how to confront this woman, I’ve been nice and asked her before what the issue is and apparently it’s just because she’s not blood related, she complains when the grandparents buy my kid a gift as it means less money is spent on her children, and if my child is included in activities the grandparents want to do with the grandkids all hell breaks loose.

I don’t want her to grow up feeling like she isn’t good enough, how do I explain to her that it’s not fault but this woman’s? And what should I do about my partners brothers partner,?

Posted in:  Mental Health, Behaviour

11 Replies

Anonymous

This woman is an asshole, unfortunately there's rarely anything you can do about that.

Your inlaws should really be telling her to pull her head in, what they buy for your daughter or include her in is none of her business, nor does she get to dictate any of that.

Your partner should really have a conversation with his brother and his partner, he's taken miss 5 on as his daughter - she's his family now whether they like it or not.

Failing that, you limit contact with all of them to spare your daughter the heartbreak.

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Anonymous

I wouldn't confront her. I'd use it as a lesson to teach your daughter that some people are asshole's and those types of people don't even deserve you wasting your breath on them.
You can't force people to by your daughter gifts, or even for them to be nice to her. All you can do, is explain to your daughter that she has some issue with this and that it's probably far more personal (Maybe it's some sort of childhood issue or something she had), probably not even about your daughter in padticular.. its about her.. and that your daughter is worthy and deserving, and that shows by the way majority people in her life treat her... not just ONE person.

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Anonymous

Tell her that going by her logic, she is not blood related either so perhaps the family need to leave her out of family related things and not buy her a gift. She sounds like a 5 year old, and to even be trying to teach her children to leave your child out is disgraceful. I think it's up to your in laws or your partner to really get tough with her and tell her what for. She needs to be told in no uncertain terms that your daughter is family and she will be treated as such and if she doesn't like it then too bad. It could come from you but I think it will pack a better punch coming from your in laws or your partner.

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Anonymous

Omg she sounds like a selfish, greedy and heartless bitch.!! What a terrible person she is..!!

Please share this page to her Facebook page and show her what an asshole she is..!!!

That is disgusting..!

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Anonymous

Thank god she will never be your daughters family.. she is a heartless bitch..!

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Anonymous

Your husband needs to deal with this by declaring strongly that she is his child.
What would this woman say should he adopt her?

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Anonymous

Holy moly this is exactly my sister in law! Except it's my husbands actual sister. I have 4 children, 2 of which are not biologically related to my husband, but he and the rest of his family and friends have taken them on like they are. They get treated no different, except by my SIL. She's rude to them, she sends messages to people bitching about time that's being spent with them. My MIL used to watch my baby when I worked a graveyard shift for 3 hours max, so I could catch up on some sleep whilst the older kids were at school. My SIL found out and sent the most horrible messages saying that she was crying every day since finding out, how hurt she was by it ect. She actually said to my husband that it wasn't fair when my MIL saw our kids because that's time she could be spending with her kids. My husband finally had enough after years of this and just recently cut her off. We are sooooo much more happier now. It'll be interesting to see how Christmas goes, but I've come to realise that you can't change people so it's best to just cut the crap out if your life! Good luck!!

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Anonymous

I don't get it either.
My kids are get the same treatment because my brothers wife cannot have kids. She will send a birthday and xmas prezzy to my hubby, but not the kids or I because it hurts her too much. 10 years this has gone on. If I go to mum's to visit (different state) they live another 5hrs from mum. She will ring up and abuse mum or have a tantrum because its not fair that my kids are visiting their grandmother, it hurts her that cannot happen for her.
My mum has never minded my kids.
If she suspects mum might mind our kids she rings and has a tanty.

This is my SIL

Its madness!

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Anonymous

Get your hubby to say something, his family so he needs to deal with it. also try to focus on the rest of the family, sounds like your hubby and everyone else is absolutely gorgeous to your beautiful daughter. She will eventually fall on her own sword, no one will appreciate her for being so cold and bitter. Rise above it.

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Anonymous

Please do say something 😥 when I was 11 my Dad and “stepmum” welcomed my baby sister. I was excitedly telling my bff all about her when my “step aunt” interjected that she was my half sister. It hurts. I’m now 33 and still not part of that side of the family. It’s taken me to adulthood to not give a shit but as a child it really hurt. The kicker is that my stepmum and step aunt are half sisters themselves but never seem to use that terminology. Nip in the bud now while she’s young x

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Anonymous

Bitch isn’t blood related either!!!

Your partner needs to address it, and maybe the grandparents too if she’s claiming jealousy shit about them spending less on hers because of one little girl.

If all else fails, spend less time around her, and others if they’re not calling her on this shit. Protect your little one from fucked up ppl like this!

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