My mum came down to visit for my sons 10th birthday. She stayed in a holiday apartment because we have dogs, she hates them and where we live.
My boys stayed with her for 2 nights, the weekend was great, party went off without a hitch, birthday lunch the following day was relaxed and good...no drama...well so we thought.
Long story short, when we picked up the kids they were, quiet, sad looking and when I asked them what was wrong they said they had been bickering over a card game and my eldest (10yo) flicked a card to his brother (7yo). It hit the table and flicked into his brothers face, when that happened my little one yelled out and cried, when the big one went to comfort him and say sorry he was pushed away and the bickering started. Meanwhile my mum was in the bathroom. She heard the bickering and came storming out of the bathroom yelling and swearing at the boys and proceeded to scream at them calling them “F’ing C... B...tards!!!” .
To say I was disappointed to hear this is an understatement. It made my heart break and blood boil.
After a few discussions with my husband and the boys I tried to ring my mum to discuss it, no answer, no call back. So I sent her a message :
“ **** had a great day, and he said he had an awesome weekend too, except for when they mucked up. We sat down as a family and spoke about it. I’m really disappointed to hear you called them F and C and B words. Please do not ever speak to them like that. “
It has been 2 weeks and I haven’t heard a peep from her. She does this with anyone who stands up to her or questions her...so I’m not surprised by the no reply. She is renowned for holding a grudge and no contact from drama she creates. I’m truly done with it.
It has taken us 2 weeks to get the boys “happy” again. In 2 weeks we are supposed to be going to her place for my youngests 8th birthday but he doesn’t want to go...and neither does his brother. And I don’t want to make them go there just to appease her.
I’m absolutely appalled that she would speak to children in this way and then make no effort to respond to me.
I know that if we don’t go she wont speak to me or the children ever again.
What would you do?