Long story short, my daughters dad hasn’t seen her in over 10 months. He now wants to see her and sent some rather threatening text messages, saying he will slaughter anyone who stops him from seeing her. He has admitted he has used drugs in the past and that he isn’t the same person anymore.
I havent responded to these messages and notified police and they say there isn’t enough of a specific threat.
Some days he send up to 10 messages a day, all go unanswered but they keep coming. They aren’t aggressive at the moment, they have calmed down.
I’ve thought of moving 3 hours away to be with my sister. I should point out I’m a single mum and my daughter with him isn’t the only child I have at home.
I guess I’m asking for are people’s opinions, would I be being to hasty to pull my older daughter out of school and uproot everyone, incase he does let it go again, or is it too big of a risk to wait around and find out? This is also the first time he has made such threats.
Run now or stay and hope things get better
Run now or stay and hope things get better
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage
14 Replies
RUN!! Don’t look back
Also keep all messages and if he decides to be a massive dick and call in the lawyers and try and force you to move back then you have the proof that you where honestly scared for your life
I agree with what you said about keeping the messages..i will just add screen shot them and print them out if you can as a just in case.
Totally agree with printing them out for just in case, I had all my messages saved to my phone BUT my toddler threw my phone in the loo and I lost all my proof
Don't dare let him near her and do everything you can to protect her and yourself. Cut the contact, doesn't matter if it's threatening right now or not. Go and speak to a different police officer, also seek help from women's centre of shelter who know how to work the system.
Why stop him seeing her? I get the weird threats but why did it get to that stage? Start with meeting up with him in public and go from there. Your daughter deserves to see her Dad. Denying any parent a relationship with their child will bring out a very ugly side, it should never get to that point for no reason.
This is my post, he doesn’t see her cause he never wanted me to keep her. He has come and gone from her life, and just a week before the threats told me he wanted nothing to do with her and that she deserved better. I’ve done nothing but try to have him involved but i think it’s reached the point that it’s not going to be a healthy relationship. He hasn’t seen her in nearly a year has been on drugs, admitted to hospital, and committed crimes in this time. He has admitted to me that he has drug induced psychosis, something that unfortunately doesn’t go away even once you stop taking drugs.
None of that will stop him getting custody if he pursues it though, and if he does it is only going to look bad for you. You could have her in his care up to 50% of the time without any control over it and he can also stop you moving. If you arrange for public meetings only it might be enough to keep him satisfied and stop him legally going for access. At least then its in your control.
If you don’t feel comfortable then you can apply to have visits at a visitation centre
Meeting with him is not in your control, even in a public place. His behaviour is disturbing and there is a limit to what you expose yourself and your children to. He needs to apply and should only be at a supervised centre with no contact with you, IF he takes it that far and IF a judge deems that's what he gets.
Then I’d be going far away if I was you. Change your number or block his number and have nothing to do with him. Get your kids somewhere safe that he doesn’t know where you are. Make sure all your settings on social media are private and you have no one on yours that will tell him.
Things do NOT get better with this kind of person. Run and don’t look back. Abusive men don’t deserve to see their kids. Safety must come first.
I would be getting out of there if I was you. I don’t trust anyone on drugs. What ever you do, never respond to his messages.
If you write back 'Cease and Desist' and he keeps going and going and does not stop, that's harassment onto of the threat to "slaughter" anyone which is a threat of assault. Go to another police station and actually talk to someone with your phone. Call DV connect and speak to them about moving. He sounds like a nut job.