Mums,
Please tell me I’m not the only one who falls to pieces when confronted. For example today at work I was struggling to do my job and my boss had a go at me and instead of standing up for myself and explaining what was actually going on I burst in to tears 😭 my first instinct is to always cry and I hate reacting like that.
Please no nasty comments I feel shit enough as it is and you will probably make me cry again lol
I want to be able to stand up for myself.
12 Replies
Being an emotional person isn’t being a sook. Chin up babe everybody deals with confrontation differently. When I’m confronted I laugh hysterically because it makes me uncomfortable and I don’t know how to react
I do that too! It's actually like an anxiety attack rather than an emotional response.
Just maybe you were having a bad day it's totally normal to react like that on top of lifes demands ,run a bath and say ya know what today is done I reacted who cares be dead in no time it's of no significance lol your fine dont over think it !
I do that too. Nearly every time. I hate it too but its not something I have been able to control unfortunately.
You're not a sook at all.
I'm like this as well, 1 time recently my centrelink employment consultant had a go at me (for something trivial i may add) in front of all the other clients and staff. Walked out of the office crying like an idiot that day. My son reacts this way too, just the other day a relief teacher yelled at him for not understanding her instructions. As soon as i picked him up he burst into tears and I know it had been plaguing him all day.
I actually think your boss needs to work on his communication style - if he's making people cry and not giving them the chance to give an explanation, well I just don't think that's good leadership tbh...
He shouldn't have had a go at you, he should have explained what it was you were doing wrong and given you some solutions how to fix it, e.g. "I see you had trouble with that task, we don't do it that way because (insert reasons), next time try doing X,Y ,Z".
Constructive criticism works much better than aggressive reprimands in my opinion anyway.
I do the same, or I cry when intensely frustrated. I don't like confrontation like that, and I tend to stammer or freeze up. I always wished I was better at it too.
I have a team and I have a team member who gets teary. Usually it’s because I have given feedback out of blue and so she isn’t ready for it
Maybe a chat with your supervisor to say that when you get confronted and on spot you react. They will be empathetic I’m sure and might be more mindful to choose a better time to talk to you. Just an idea
I can have this response, I have learned to keep it in check at work. Most people don’t know what to do and it actually is counnter productive. If you knew you where struggling, maybe you should have asked for assistance, if you boss still had a go that’s on him/her. I don’t know how to fix it, for me it was practice and acknowledgement that it was getting there and breathing, removing myself from the situation, and re group. There is also other pieces to this, have you been at you job long? Should you be able to do the task, is your boss frustrated by repeat event? Do you like this job? What drives you
I get like that too, you aren’t alone.!
I internalise then I eventually explode. If I am crying it’s because I want to punch your face in but end up crying because I have so much rage.
I had a boss who when I stuffed up(one stuff up in 8 years doing the job) tell me I have to be careful as I’ll get a reputation and no one will want to hire me instead of explaining it, the consequences and what i could do to improve(already knew it all but she got a kick out of her power trip and I already knew what my mistake was and went about fixing it which was the right process as per advised by My REP) I was angry as she herself had made the same mistake many times.
We all handle it differently and it’s better to release when it happens than hold it in.
Sometimes it is hard to control emotions if everything is compounding.
I find myself really bad about a week before my period.
It’s more than likely just a part of who you are.
I cry over stupid shit all the time.
Get you’re hormones checked out, eat well.
And if you’re into it, check out your natal chart - it may give you some insight into how you naturally are which may help you deal with it by understanding you as a person.
Don’t change for anyone emotional is not a bad thing but a good thing and don’t worry about what other people think!!!
Link below for the natal chart if you’re interested, I found it quite accurate for me.
https://horoscopes.astro-seek.com/birth-chart-horoscope-online
This was me for a long time. I would either fall to pieces and just cry or I would cry while standing up for myself, make a scene and then walk out and quit on the spot. Not all jobs, but I’ve had some shitty bosses in my time. I used to hate that I would get so emotional over silly things. All of the times I lost control emotionally was in my 20’. Im now 35 and I know myself better at this age than ever before and I can handle my emotions so much better. I don’t cry anymore, I say what I’m thinking and how the person is making me feel. Are they giving you constructive criticism or are they being a power tripping ass? Either way the person upset you regardless of how sensitive you are, they may need to know that they should think about the way they approach people. Stand strong and speak up for yourself xx