feeling guilty

Anonymous

feeling guilty

I work 7 days a fortnight and on the days I have off my son is in day care as I use this time to cook, clean and run errands. I also catch up on sleep as he is a terrible sleeper and teether, etc we have had a lot of issues and I had pnd. But I feel guilty that I don't have him with me, and feel I'm getting judged by day care and other mums. Do other mums put their lo into day care when they have time off?

Posted in:  Parenthood Guilt, Baby & Toddler

8 Replies

Anonymous

Yep. I do! I also feel guilted by others but no, i love it, and don't feel I'm doing anything wrong. In Saying that, some people can make you feel guilty if you are childless for 10 minutes, so other peoples opinions really dont matter! Im lucky the daycare are awesome and not in the least judgmental, we chat about what i do each day & how my job apps are going & life in general, sometimes i drop her off in my trackies & slippers and I'm guilt free. It works for us so i will keep doing it :)

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Anonymous

There are some people who will think your a bad mum but those people need to get some perspective in their lives. Kids love day care, they are well looked after, well fed, and nurtured by qualified people who like children. Some people believe that as a mother you have to totally crush yourself and sacrifice everything for that child. That is totally wrong. Children will leave us at some point and go and lead their own lives and we need to know who we still are and not have our self worth totally wrapped up in our children when that happens. Also not everyone is built to be a mum 24/7 so we all need to balance. We do what works for our families. I had my son in daycare 2 days a week when I didn't work at all because I needed time to not have someone attached to me for my mental health. It made me a better mum when I was with my son and also made me more well rounded as a person.

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Anonymous

Thanks so much feel a lot better. I also need the space for health reasons to

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Anonymous

Dont feel guilty atleast you are working, Alot of mums put their kids in day care 5 days a week and don't even have a job! I work 6 days a fortnight and my son goes into day care 8 days a fortnight, I use those two days to do everything aswel!

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Anonymous

I am very lucky to have alot of family I can call on (my sister lives with) and there is nothing better than being able to duck out and get things done with out having to pack and unpack the car each stop. If I didn't have this then I would do the same! My sil has 3 kids (1in school) and the 2 los are in 2days also. Dont feel bad mumma you need to give your self a break and enjoy the time you do get to spend with your precious kidlet.

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Anonymous

I think ppl do what works for them
I had my 2 kids in long daycare 2 days a week, now since my work days have increased but im only working until lunch I have booked into home daycare and only have them there until i finish except 1 day a week when they still go to long daycare and I love this day because I get to get stuff done
do what works for you!

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Anonymous

I am able to pick my children up from school everyday, however they go to Asc 3 days a week they love it and when asked if They want me to pick them up straight from school I get a look of horror..parents are still humans as well I think we forget that. We need time to be our selves and yes sometimes have that selfish HOT cup of coffee or watch a FULL uninterrupted epp of our fav TV shows. As long as your happy and so is he go with it..

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Anonymous

Its ok love xx If you feel its ok then its ok xx I used to get judged a lot too and i was studying and working but you just start ignoring the negativity. You are his mum and you know in your heart what you need to be a good mum when he is home xxx Things iron out eventually and you will be ok xxx Breathe it out and don't worry so much about other judgemental people, I have often befriended the judged mums at daycare and also the ones whose kids have gotten into trouble, the sighs of relief and the thanks for invites to kids parties etc has made a huge difference. Everyone else can get off their bloody high horse, support and encouragement goes much further than judgement and hatred. xx Keep your chin up lovely x Everything will be ok, kids are tough on a good day, let alone the days when you and they are tired and if they are bad sleepers.

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