So angry at men!

Anonymous

So angry at men!

Why are people so shit. Such liers.
I was with my ex for 2 years. He was the only father figure to my daughter who's now 2 and a half. His kids were like my own. I loved him. But I always felt he didn't love me.
7 months into the relationship his ex contact me after he put us in a relationship on Facebook. He told me not to contact her back that she was crazy etc. I didn't listen to him. I found out off her that he was cheating on me with her. Sexting her. Sending photos to her. Doing every thing but intercourse.
And i was dumb enough to take him back. He soon cut her out of his life except for things to do with their sons.
He was always saying to me that I wanted my ex (my daughter dad) back. That he bets I still love him. But this guys never meet my daughter. He was really DV and bashed me when I was pregnant at 10 weeks. So I escaped. I kept saying to my bf how can I still love him when he bashed me and tried to kill my daughter our daughter!
But I guess he was just talking about him self.
Flash forward to February this year and my bfs ex took a restraining order out on him. Said he tried to attack her with an axe a few years back. That his sexually assulting her when he drops the sons off. And is trying to charge him for rape when they first got together. He was 19 she was 15. It was consentual but she was just getting nasty if you ask me. As much as I now hate him.
The avo went ahead. He use to tell me how much he hated her. How livid he was towards her that he wanted to have her killed.
He swore to me that he didn't love her that she was a bitch that he loved me. How could he love her now she's done this. And that his sorry he cheated by sending a photo but it's not actually really cheating. Because they didn't have intercourse.
His now telling every one even him self that all he did was send 1 photo of his dick to her. And that's all nothing more nothing else. And I hate it. Every time he says he cheated he puts it in inverted commers to his mum and every one and to me. Even uses his fingers when he says cheating.
I was pregnant at the time of them cheating but I lost our baby soon after I found out about when he was doing. I was on the pill. Something I still have to greave. And his telling every one his friends his family he just sent a photo. Even my family.
Well flash forward to 3 months ago and his ex asked him to break up with me and she will break up with her man so they can be back together. He apparently said no way and walked off.
Flash forward to today and I've been appart from him for a month. I couldn't get over his cheating and was 99% sure he was doing it again. Not to mention him being drunk every single night. I know he had depression and i really think now putting every thing together he drunk cause he missed her. And he couldn't handle being with me. One night he called me a using dog i was only with him cause I couldn't have my ex back. But that was about him I reckon. He would only have sex with me in the dark and never kiss me. If it was light he wouldn't open his eyes.
My daughter asking where "dad" has gone. I never let her believe he was her real dad but she's too young to understand.
She's broken up with her boyfriend and I've heard they are sleeping together. I don't care they are both crazy and can have each other. Good luck telling the judge that the avo was a lie or what ever and has to be lifted for them to be together. And the house settlement and all that crap that's in proceeding now. And her friend she told that her son's dad was so abusive and she's so scared of him had him arrested and jailed over night. Any way I'm fuckn guttered. His been saying our whole relationship he doesn't love her he will never be with her again. How much he can't stand her can't even look at the bitch. But it was all a lie. He was taking me to look for rings to see what I like because he said he was going to propose soon. But that was a lie too.
Why do men lye. Why do they just screw me over waist my time. Pretend they love me and this time my daughter too. Why are they such ass holes. I'm 25 now and feel like I've missed the boat. That I'm never going to get married now cause I never want another relationship.
I'm so angry I could punch something. Hit someone!! Or maybe there is just something wrong with me..

Posted in:  Relationships & Marriage, Mental Health, Loss & Grief

5 Replies

Anonymous

Sweetheart!! There's nothing wrong with you! You just keep falling for the wrong guys. It's a good time to stay single and concentrate on your daughter. Learn to be happy by yourself and see yourself and your daughter as a family, not feel as though a man is missing from the picture. When you are ready to date again (which I hope is years from now), don't fall for the first guy who comes along, raise your standards! Use what you've learnt about men so far to create some rules for future relationships and expectations from a partner. You're only 25, you have all the time in the world.

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Anonymous

You’re only 25 you most definitely haven’t missed the boat! You’re still young with your whole life ahead of you. Don’t waste another minute thinking of your ex. Don’t waste anymore time getting angry. It’s time to focus on you and your own family. I wouldn’t rush into another relationship. However when you’re ready to meet another man, get to know him and don’t rush things. If he sends dick picks to other women or accuses you of wanting your ex back then don’t stay with him, kick him to the curb and move on to someone who loves and respects you. Learn from this and take notice of the warning signs in future.

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Anonymous

All the red flags were there from the beginning, this time learn from it, walk away at the start. This should be a funny story, met this crazy guy, seemed hung up on his ex, full of drama, ditched him after a month. Also, please don’t get pregnant to a man until you are in a fully committed stable relationship, even marriage if it is important to you. I repeat, if you want to be married, dont have a kid to a man, set boundaries. Sorry to be blunt but you have a child, you need good responsible role models in your life, not entertaining this kind of drama and filth.
You need to be alone for a while, learn who you are, get your self esteem up so you don’t take this crap. You’ve been in a dv relationship, now this, you deserve a loving partner, you and your daughter deserve the best, I just wish you could see that. Him leaving is a blessing and I truly hope you see that soon, time to build yourself up, get your confidence up and tackle the world alone. If you need to speak to a psychologist, do it, you’re worth it, your daughter is worth it. She needs a peaceful loving home, you don’t want her to need therapy in years to come because of your choices. You’re strong, you can do this.

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Anonymous

You need to really step back and read this over and over. There were a million warning flags that he was a POS (piece of sh**) from the start and you continued on with the relationship. You've been naive and vulnerable and now think that this is normal, which it totally isn't.

Take the time to work on your happiness and focus on your daughter. Don't worry about men for now. If it happens, it happens, but girl you are so young and so many people don't meet or have children with "the one" til mid 30s early 40s!!!

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Anonymous

There is nothing wrong with you. Unfortunately you got hooked by a narcissist (research it you will probably be shocked at how much will make sense to you after you learn about it). Luckily for you, you have escaped.You need to go full blown no contact. Refuse to talk to and even about him to people. Ignore everything to do with him. He is still renting space in your head which is what he wants.
Get yourself some help, please. People need professional help to move past narcassistic abuse. You will need support if he tries to hoover you back in (which he probably will attempt when his current supply dries up) just like he did before.
My husband is a self confessed narcissist who admits to not giving a stuff about hurting anyone as long as he gets what he wants so i know the drill and recognized so many of their screwed up tactics in your post. I know how hurt and confused you are but ITS NOT YOUR fault there is nothing wrong with you. Im still formulating my safe escape plan to get away from my narc abuser. But you are out. Stay out, no contact, find support and stay safe.

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