Im curious to see where my fellow sisters sit when it comes to paying for extra curricular activities...
I feel that if the parents are separated, that paying 1/2 each for essentials such as medical costs, education costs & schooling activities under the curriculum, is acceptable. But that extra curricular activities such as sports/music practice/hobbies etc should be discussed/agreed to by both parents, before any expectation of payment from the other parent should occur.
My belief stems from the fact that decisions that involve the children should include both parents, not just one parent who makes decisions, pays for things & then puts their hand out over & over again even after receiving child support.. My biggest gripe being a parent who makes an autonomous decision, then says to the children "you wont be able to do that activity because Mummy/Daddy (the other parent) wont pay for that"... even though a large sum of child support is being provided.
What do others think?
Where do you draw the line?
Where do you draw the line?
Posted in:
Money
5 Replies
The parents need to discuss and do what works for them.
We dont automatically split anything 50/50. I tell himabout big costs ie medical and he will pay. He pays towards school uniforms or bags in his own way. I sign the kids up to extra curricula when its right, affordable and i can commit to it. He usually pays towards it or pays a term and equipment when he finds out what theyre doing.
Child support already factors this in so stop giving extra if you don't have capacity
I'm on the receiving end of CS and I don't ask for anything more than what I get in CS. All of those activities are part of child support. It's extra things like school camps, excessive medical treatments and therapy etc that aren't and that would have to be worked out between both parents.
It would also depend on how much the paying parent is actually paying, what may seem like a large amount to you might not be that large in the grand scheme of things. And if the other parent is paying school fees that would be a fair chunk of CS gone, if not more. It really is an individual thing. The other thing you could do is see if you can pay these things yourselves and take it off child support.
I don't think there's a black and white answer for this, everyone's financial situation and even relationship with their ex is different which means having a rational conversation about these things and coming to a compromise isn't always possible.
Though coming from my perspective as a kid that never got to do any activities I wanted because neither parent would pay, I think if you can afford it and it enriches the child's life then just pay half or contribute in some way.
I agree with not committing to something as a single parent, and expecting the other parent to pay. In saying this I don't consult with my ex over extra curricular activities that I take the kids to when I have them. I pay for them and therefore expect no involvement from my ex.
At the moment I receive no child support from my ex and the kids have been involved in extra curricular activities whether I have/haven't received cs.